Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

My mom ending up passing away, and I got really depressed and didn't have money for therapy, and so I started doing standup to cope with my mom's death.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

Two brothers and a sister, my niece, my nephew... we're a very small group. We're very close, very tight-knit. We spend every holiday weekend together.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

If I'm laughing, you know I'm either very happy or very sad. I cope with things with jokes.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

My favorite movie is 'Die Hard.' It doesn't have pinatas and mariachis. It's just a good movie.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

The Texas thing is such a big deal because whenever I see Texas in a TV show, they always show slow-moving cattle and cowboys with the hats. I wanted to show that Texas isn't a stereotype.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I understand a lot of celebrities lose weight because they have the opportunity to get in shape and become healthier, but when you get so polished, you can't tell the story of a blue-collar family anymore.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

The first eight years of my life, we lived in an abandoned diner - we were basically squatters.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

My family didn't have money, and I think it made me fearless. I'm willing to try everything and not be afraid because what's the worst that can be happen? It might not work out, but I can't be worse off than when I was a kid.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I love the Rio Grande Valley. I always say it's home - Texas is home. I've been out in L.A. a little over ten years, and I still get so excited when I go back home. It just feels comfortable; it makes me smile.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

We grew up devout Catholics, so my trips to San Juan always include going to the churches that we used to go to and lighting candles and everything. Everything I do in San Juan is what I used to do with my mom, kind of as a tribute to her.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

A lot of my material was based on my family.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I'm not trying to represent the whole Latino community. There are too many different cultures, and Latinos will always say, 'My family doesn't do that.'

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

As a kid, I really wanted to have my own show. But when you grow up in poverty, people tell you nothing is possible. So I kind of gave up on that dream.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

Looking back, I remember my family laughing a lot. We were never the kind of people that dwelled on hard times. My family laughs when things are tough. Growing up like that, I got used to making jokes about things that were difficult. So when I started doing stand-up, that's what I went towards.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I can't tell a story about a working-class family on a premium channel that you have to pay to get.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I grew up in a very Catholic household. We were pretty conservative.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

It might sound dramatic and a little grandiose, but as a Latina, I would like to be someone that gives a voice to my culture.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I couldn't afford therapy, so I just watched 'Frasier.' Season 4 was a breakthrough.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I always knew, even as a kid, that my mom had a really rough life, and I always wanted to make her feel happy and to make her feel good.

Cristela Alonzo
Cristela Alonzo

I did the 'Wizard of Oz' in third grade, and I was a witch.