If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly.
People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.
Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.
I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.
Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread.
Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
