Ed: Big Al says so.
Shaun: Yeah, but Big Al says dogs can't look up!
[Philip is crouched beside the car, after being bitten by a zombie]
Philip: You're not driving that car.
Ed: You gonna thank me then?
Shaun: For what?
Ed: Tidying up!
Shaun: Doesn't look that tidy.
Ed: Well, I had a few beers when I finished.
Rabid Monkeys Newsreader: Claims that the virus was caused by rage-infected monkeys have now been dismissed as bull...
[turns off the TV]
David: For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite!
[repeated line]
Ed: Cock it!
[Shaun nervously addresses the rest of the electronics store staff]
Shaun: Now, as well as, er, Mr. Sloane being off today, I'm afraid Ash is, er, feeling a little bit, erm, under the weather. So I will be taking charge as the, erm...
Noel: ...oldest...
Shaun: ...senior staff member.
Ed: There's a girl in the garden.
Shaun: What?
Ed: In the garden, there is a girl.
Barbara: Hello Pickle! It's me, mum. Dad said he saw you in town today and mentioned that you might be visiting tomorrow, which would be lovely. Will you be bringing Elizabeth with you this time? Only we can't wait to meet her finally and also um... I was wondering if she wanted anything special for lunch. Cause these days a lot of people don't eat meat.
[repeated line]
Ed: I've got nothing.
[in "I Married A Zombie" sketch]
Trisha Goddard: You go to bed with it?
[repeated line]
Shaun: Ed, this is serious!
[Ed pulls the car over after doing a couple of 360s]
Ed: Whoa, mama!
Shaun: Christ! What the hell do you think you're doing?
Ed: Chill out. Everyone's all right.
Shaun: Stop telling me to chill out!
David: What are we going to eat?
Dianne: Toasties!
Ed: There's a Breville out back.
David: Great. Saved by nibbles.
Barbara: My, how you've grown!
Ed: Yeah, you'd better believe it.
Shaun: Would anyone like... a peanut?
[David discovers that the zombies have somehow made it into the bar. Shaun, Ed and Liz are still beating the barman]
Shaun: Why is Queen still playing?
David: Ah, we have a situation here.
Shaun: I KNOW!
