100 Shaun of the Dead Quotes (2026) #5

Shaun of the Dead

Ed: I'm sorry, Shaun.
Shaun: It's OK.
Ed: No, I'm *sorry*, Shaun.
Shaun: What?
[smells Ed's fart]
Shaun: Oh, God, that's rotten!
Ed: I'll stop doing it when you stop laughing!
Shaun: I am not laughing!

Shaun of the Dead

[a jukebox begins playing Queen's "Don't Stop Me Now" while the zombie pub owner attacks the group]
Shaun: Who the hell put this on?
Ed: It's on random.
Liz: For fuck's sake!

Shaun of the Dead

[David is pointing a gun at Barbara and Shaun is trying to stop him]
Liz: PLEASE CAN WE... JUST CALM... THE FUCK... DOWN!

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun: They still out there?
[Ed checks, revealing two zombies scratching at the window]
Ed: Yeah. What you think we should do?
Shaun: Have a sit down?

Shaun of the Dead

Dianne: SHAUN!
[Dianne throws a dart and misses]
Shaun: NO!
[Dianne throws another dart and hits the zombie]
Shaun: YES, yes, in the head!
[Dianne throws a third dart and hits Shaun in the head on accident]
Shaun: AHHHHHHHHH!

#hits

Shaun of the Dead

[Shaun and Ed pull up to Barbara's house and sees Philip's Jaguar in the driveway]
Ed: Oh! Hello! Who's a pretty boy, then?
[wolf whistle]
Ed: You didn't tell me Barbara had a Jag. I've always wanted to drive one of those.
Shaun: Yeah, well, it's Philip's, okay? He won't let anybody near it. Honestly, I put half a Mars

bar in the glove box once and he chased me around the garden with a bit of wood.
Ed: Fuck. It's gorgeous.

Shaun of the Dead

Barbara: It's been a funny sort of day, hasn't it?

Shaun of the Dead

Dianne: Daffs is always taking me to see these listed buildings, and I'm always dragging him to the theatre.

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun: All right, I've got a car outside, but it's going to be a bit cramped, so has anyone got transport?
Dianne: Yes, yes!
Shaun: Great, where?
Dianne: Oh? No, well I passed my test.

Shaun of the Dead

[repeated line]
Yvonne: Oh, my God! Shaun!

Shaun of the Dead

[Shaun and Ed are getting psyched-up to go to Shaun's mum's to kill Philip]
Shaun: I gotta do a wee first.

Shaun of the Dead

[showing customers in the shop a TV set, sounding bored out of his mind, almost a zombie, in a droning voice]
Shaun: This one comes with a basic sort of digital package, uh, you got your Lifestyle Channels there, a bit of "Trisha," um, you got "Entertainment" - don't know what that is. News. All the basic, uh, news channels.

Shaun of the Dead

[first lines]
John: Last orders, please!

Shaun of the Dead

[David points a gun at Shaun's mother Barbara]
Shaun: Don't point that gun at my mum!
Ed: Don't point that gun at Barbara!

Shaun of the Dead

Liz, Declan: [as each survivor passes by their parallel counterpart] Hi.
David, Mark: [formally] Hello.
Dianne, Maggie: [friendly] Hi!
Barbara, Yvonne's Mum: [politely] Hello.
Ed, Cousin

Tom: [too involved with their cell phones, briefly glancing at each other, muttering] Hello.

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun: Well, I mean, it's not that I don't like David and Di, you know.
[to David and Diane]
Shaun: Guys, it's not that I don't like you.
Dianne: [shrugs] It's all right.
Shaun: [turns to Liz] And I do want to spend time with you.
[pause]
Shaun: It's just Ed doesn't have

too many friends...

Shaun of the Dead

Liz: You should do me. I'll muck it up if I have to do myself.
Shaun: [breaking down] I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mum and my girlfriend all in the same evening!