I would hate to meet myself at 15.
Americans just don't understand dry wit.
You have to do stand-up quite a long time before you learn how to do it well.
It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be.
Most stand-ups, once they have done it, think of it as their default job. I'm pretty sure Jon Stewart still feels that way now. You are a stand-up first; other things come and go.
The disconnect between America and its military is shocking.
People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character.
People really have come for a dialogue when they go to a stand-up show in the U.K. They say, 'I understand that you have now finished your little comedy monologue; now I have something to say regarding what I've just heard.
There is so much cross-pollination between the U.S. and Britain in terms of comedians. British TV comedies work well in the U.S. American stand-ups make it big in Britain.
Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it.
There are so many low points with stand-up. You are perpetually humiliated, so it doesn't really matter anymore. I don't have any dignity left to lose. An audience can't hurt you anymore when you've been completely dismantled.
A Southern accent is not a club in my bag.
If I wanted to take a more activist or journalistic slant in work, I should probably just go be an activist or a journalist. But I'm happy being a comedian.
We in Britain stopped evolving gastronomically with the advent of the pie. Everything beyond that seemed like a brave, frightening new world. We knew the French were up to something across the Channel, but we didn't want anything to do with it.
Stand-up, for me, is really more of an addiction, so you have to feed the beast whenever you can.
You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job.
I feel non-stop Brit shame!
When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing.
Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels.
There are some people who watch NASCAR for the highly skilled driving - but most people watch it for the crashes.
