Clementine: Joel, hide me in your humiliation!
Clementine: Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a fucked-up girl who's lookin' for my own peace of mind; don't assign me yours.
Joel: I remember that speech really well.
Clementine: I had you pegged, didn't I?
Joel: You had the whole human race
pegged.
Clementine: Hmm. Probably.
Joel: I still thought you were gonna save my life... even after that.
Clementine: Ohhh... I know.
Joel: It would be different, if we could just give it another go-round.
Clementine: Remember me. Try your best; maybe we can.
Clementine: Let me show you something... come on...
Joel: I think I heard a crack.
Clementine: It's not gonna crack, or break, or... it's so thick!... Show me which constellations you know.
Joel: Um... oh... I don't... know any.
Clementine: Show me which ones you know!
Joel: Okay... okay... oh! There's Osidius.
Clementine: Where?
Joel: Right there... see? Sort of a swoop and a cross, Osidius the Emphatic.
Clementine: You're full of shit, right?
Joel: Nope. Osidius, right there, swoop and cross.
Clementine: Shut the fuck up!
Clementine: [Clementine has dyed her hair orange] You like? To match my sweatshirt, exactly.
Joel: Ahaaahhhhh! Ohhhhhh! I like it!
Clementine: You do?
Joel: You look like a tangerine!
Clementine: Hmmm, Clementine the tangerine.
Joel: Juicy... 'n seedless.
Clementine: I like that.
Patrick: You know that girl we did last week? The one with the potatoes.
Stan: That girl? Yeah, that's this guy's girl.
Patrick: Yeah.
Stan: Right... Was. Took care of that.
Patrick: Well uh, I kind of fell in love with her that night.
Stan: What? You little
fuck!
Patrick: What?
Stan: She was unconscious, man.
Patrick: Well, she was beautiful and... I stole a pair of her panties as well.
Stan: Jesus!
Patrick: What? It's not like - I mean they were clean and all.
Stan: Don't tell me this stuff! I don't wanna
hear this shit!
Clementine: My embarrassing admission is I really like that you're nice, right now.
Joel: It's goddamn freezing on this beach. Montauk in February, brilliant, Joel.
Clementine: Drink up, young man. It'll make the whole seduction part less repugnant.
Joel: He's seducing my girlfriend with MY words and MY things! He stole her underwear! Jesus Christ, he stole her underwear.
[Clementine comes in drunk and collapses on the couch. Joel has been sitting up and reading; his voice is angry]
Joel: It's 3 o'clock.
Clementine: I kinda sorta wrecked your car.
Joel: You were driving drunk. It's pathetic.
Clementine: I was a little tipsy. Don't call me pathetic.
Joel: Well, it *is* pathetic. And it's fucking irresponsible. You could've killed somebody. I don't know, maybe you did kill somebody. Should we turn on the news and see? Should I check the grille to see if there's children or small animals?