Lloyd Richards: There comes a time that a piano realizes that it has not written a concerto.
Margo: And you, I take it, are the Paderewski who plays his concerto on me, the piano?
Bill Sampson: I start shooting a week from Monday. Zanuck is impatient. He wants me, he needs me.
Margo: Zanuck, Zanuck, Zanuck. What are you two, lovers?
Llyod Richards: I understand that your understudy, Miss Harrington, has given her notice.
Margo: Too bad.
Bill Sampson: I'm broken up about it.
Karen: Nothing is forever in the Theatre. Whatever it is, it's here, it flares up, burns hot and then it's gone.
Margo: [to Bill] You be the host. It's your party. Happy birthday, welcome home, and we who are about to die salute you.
Llyod Richards: You knew when you came in that the audition was over, that Eve was your understudy, playing that childish little game of cat and mouse.
Margo: Not mouse, never mouse. If anything *rat*!
Margo: I'll admit I may have seen better days, but I'm still not to be had for the price of a cocktail like a salted peanut.
Birdie: We now got everything a dressing room needs except a basketball hoop.
Margo: Where is Princess... fire and music?
Karen: I'm sorry, Margo.
Margo: What for? It isn't as though you personally drained the gas tank yourself.
Bill Sampson: [to Eve] What I go after, I want to go after. I don't want it to come after me.
Margo: I'm a junkyard.
Karen: Where were we going that night, Lloyd and I? Funny, the things you remember and the things you don't.
Eve: When you're a secretary in a brewery, it's pretty hard to make-believe you're anything else. Everything is beer.
Margo: [as she's getting ready for the party] The extra help get here?
Birdie: There's some loose characters dressed as maids and butlers. Who'd you call, the William Morris Agency?
Margo: You're not being funny: I could *get* actors for less.
Lloyd Richards: Karen, let me tell you about Eve. She's got everything - a born actress. Sensitive, understanding, young, exciting, vibrant...
Karen: Don't run out of adjectives, dear.
Llyod Richards: Eve did mention the play, but in passing. She'd never ask to play a part like Cora. She'd never have the nerve.
Karen: Eve would ask Abbott to give her Costello.
