Korg: Hey, man. I'm Korg. We're gonna get outta here. Wanna come?
[Banner places his hand on the Quinjet's handprint scanner]
Quinjet Computer: Voice activation required.
Bruce Banner: Banner.
Quinjet Computer: Welcome, Strongest Avenger.
Thor: Loki, I thought the world of you. I thought we were going to fight side-by-side forever, but at the end of the day you're you and I'm me and... oh, maybe there's still good in you but... let's be honest, our paths diverged a long time ago.
Loki: [emotional] Yeah... it's probably for the best that we'll never see each other again.
Thor: That's what you always wanted.
[pats Loki on the back]
[first lines]
[Thor is thrown into Muspelheim in chains]
Thor: I know what you're thinking. "Oh, no. Thor's in a cage. How did this happen?" Well, sometimes you have to get captured just to get a straight answer out of something. It's a long story. Basically, I'm a bit of a hero. See, I've spent some time on Earth... for the record, I saved the planet a couple of
times. Then I went searching through the cosmos for a couple of magic colorful Infinity Stone things... but didn't find any. That's when I came across a path of death, and destruction. Which led me all the way here to this cage... where I met you.
[looks at a skeleton]
Thor: Quite unique. It was made from this special metal from the heart of a dying star. And when i spun it really, really fast it gave me the ability to fly.
Korg: You rode a hammer?
Thor: No, I didn't ride the hammer
Korg: The hammer ride you on your back?
Thor: No, I would spin it
really fast and it would pull me off the...
Korg: Oh my god, the hammer pulled you off?
Thor: The ground! It would pull me off the ground, into the air and I would fly.
[at a retirement home]
Loki: [in a dark suit] I left him right here.
Thor: [in casual wear] You mean on the pavement outside, or actually in the building currently being demolished?
Loki: How was I supposed to know? I can't see into the future, I'm not a witch!
Thor: Well, you're dressed like one.
[entering the Vault of Asgard]
Skurge: [awestruck] Asgard's treasures...
Hela: [knocks over the Infinity Gauntlet] Fake! Most of this stuff is fake anyway.
Hela: [looks at the Casket of Ancient Winters] Weak!
Hela: [looks at the Crown of Surtur] That's smaller than I expected.
Hela: [looks at the Tesseract] That's actually... not bad.
Hela: [approaches the Eternal Flame] Now this... this is truly special.
Grandmaster: Hey Sparkles, here's the deal: you want to get back to ass-place, ass-berg...
Thor: ASGARD!
Grandmaster: Any contender who defeats my champion, their freedom they shall win.
Thor: Fine. Then point me in the direction of whoever's ass I have to kick!
Grandmaster: I just, I gotta say. I'm proud of you all. This revolution has been a huge success. Yay us! Pat, pat on the back. Pat on the back. Come on. No? Me, too. 'Cause I've been a big part of it. Can't have a revolution without somebody to overthrow! So, ah, you're welcome. And, uh, it's a tie.
Thor: I think we should disband the Revengers.
Loki: Hit her with a lightning blast.
Thor: I just hit her with the biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning. It did nothing.
Valkyrie: We just need to hold her off until everyone's on board.
Thor: It won't end there. The longer
Hela's on Asgard, the more powerful she grows. She'll hunt us down. We need to stop her here and now.
Valkyrie: So what do we do?
Loki: I'm not doing 'get help'.
Korg: [Asgard is now in ruins] The damage is not too bad. As long as the foundations are still strong, we can rebuild this place. It will become a haven for all peoples and aliens of the universe.
[Asgard explodes]
Korg: Oof. Now those foundations are gone. Sorry.
Thor: Has anyone here fought the Grandmaster's champion?
Korg: Yeah. Doug has. Hey, Doug. Could you come over here? Oh, yeah, I forgot, Doug's dead. Anyone who fights the Grandmaster's champion perished. You're not actually thinking about fighting him, are you?
Thor: Yes, I am. I'm gonna fight him, win, and get the hell off this
planet!
Korg: That's exactly what Doug used to say! See you later, New Doug!
Dr. Stephen Strange: [gives up Loki to Thor] I think you can handle things from here.
Loki: [pulls out blades] Handle me? Who are you? You think you're some kind of sorcerer? Don't think for one minute, you second-rate...
Dr. Stephen Strange: Bye bye.
[sends Thor and Loki through a portal]
Thor: Where's Odin?
Loki: You just couldn't stay away, could you? Everything was fine without you. Asgard was prospering. You ruined everything! Ask them!
Thor: Where's Father? Did you kill him?
Loki: You have what you wanted. You have the independence you asked for. Ah!
[Thor puts Mjolnir on his chest]
Loki: ouch, ok! I know exactly where he is.
Loki: [Thor & Loki transport to NYC via Bifrost. Arrived at Shady Acres Care Home that's being demolished to ruins] I swear I left him right here.
Thor: Right here on the sidewalk or right here where the building's being demolished? Great planning!
Loki: How
was I supposed to know? I can't the see the future. I'm not a witch.
Thor: No? Then why are you dressed like one?
Loki: [Annoyed] Hey!
Thor: I can't believe you're alive! I saw you die. I mourned you. I cried for you.
Loki: I'm... honored?