Chloe: Max, Come on, I'm your friend. Okay? And as your friend, I gotta be honest with you. I don't care about you or your problems.
Snowball: I feel heroic! And handsome! I'm a little wet, but I still look good. I look good.
Chloe: And, when that random cat tried to eat Sweet Pea, who saved him?
Buddy: It wasn't a random cat. It was you.
Chloe: The identity of the random cat is not the point. We're talking about who saved him!
Mel: Max did!
Snowball: [kisses Gidget, jumps off bridge] Remember me!
Pops: This is uh, Puffball, Squash-Face, Weiner Dog, Yellow Bird, Eagle-Eye, Guinea Pig Joe. And, of course my, girlfriend Rhonda.
Snowball: The revolution has begun! Liberated forever! Domesticated never!
Buddy: [as they enter the sewer] What is that smell?
Pops: It's poo-poo with a dash of caca.
Chloe: Because she's a dog person, Max. And dog people do weird, inexplicable things. Like... they get dogs instead of cats.
Pops: Now, if we take the human route, getting there is gonna take days. You may have lots of time, but for me every breath is a cliffhanger.
Snowball: Who are we? *Who* are *we*? We are the Flushed Pets. Thrown away by our owners and now we are out for revenge! It's like a club, but with biting and scratching.
Snowball: Welcome my dogs! Oh, you guys look weird. Hurry up, come on in.
Buddy: You said it was a costume party!
Mel: Why do you listen to me?
Buddy: How you been, old timer?
Pops: Paralyzed.
[Awkward pause]
Gidget: Great!
Snowball: Death is coming to Brooklyn. And it's got buck teeth and a cotton tail!
snowball: [to Snake's Guarding Door] the New Password is Don't Ask the Leader for the Password
[Snake's Eye's Turn Green and Smile]
snowball: .
Snowball: That raccoon is lying. He's not the president.
[last lines]
Max: Welcome home, Duke.
Duke: Thanks, Max.
Max: Maybe the legend of dogs coming from wolves is jus... is just wrong. Maybe, like, maybe one puppy asked his mom, "Where did we come from?" And the mom said "Woof." And the kid was like, "Oh wolves?" And she was like, "Yeah, fine."
Snowball: [to Max] Can I call you "Tiny Dog"?
