The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Action!
[Wiseau enters the scene]
Tommy Wiseau: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit! I did not hit her. I did not.
[throws water bottle on the ground]
Tommy Wiseau: Oh, hi Mark.
[pause, then the crew applauds before Greg hugs Wiseau]

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Mrs. Sestero: How old are you?
Tommy Wiseau: Don't worry, I'm Greg age.
Mrs. Sestero: You're 19?
[Tommy shrugs]
Mrs. Sestero: [Sarcastic] Yeah. I just turned 14.
Tommy Wiseau: [Not knowing it's sarcastic] Wow, happy birthday!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Judd Apatow: Just because you want it doesn't mean it can happen.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Philip: Hey, Tommy, how old is Denny supposed to be?
Tommy Wiseau: He your age. 15-16 years old boy.
Philip: Uh... I'm 26
Tommy Wiseau: [pauses] Same thing.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Sandy Schklair: Take 17, Action!
Tommy Wiseau: [Wiseau enters the scene] I hit her!
Sandy Schklair: No! Do you want to change the line?
Tommy Wiseau: Script is script. Script stay same.
Greg Sestero: You're doing great, man! We'll get there!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Tommy Wiseau: [Practicing his lines] 'Oh, hi Mark... ' 'Oh, hi Mark... ' 'Oh, hi Mark... '
Tommy Wiseau: Oh, hi Greg!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Greg Sestero: Tommy, dude, this really isn't necessary.
Tommy Wiseau: No, no! Very necessary. I need to show my ass to sell this picture.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Why is he having sex with her bellybutton? He knows where her vagina is, right?

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[from trailer]
Greg Sestero, Sandy Schklair: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Action!
[Wiseau enters the scene. He pauses, forgetting his lines again]
Tommy Wiseau: What is line?

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[as Johnny kills himself in "The Room"]
Dan Janjigian: Do it!
Juliette, Robyn Paris: Do it! Do it!
The Whole Audience: Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Greg Sestero: You are a fucking villain, you fucking Frankenstein-looking motherfucker!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Tommy Wiseau: Los Angeles, everybody want to be star. All the pretty boys. They're lining up for the big shot.
Greg Sestero: Just uh, just have to get lucky, I guess.
Tommy Wiseau: No. No. It's not luck, Greg. Greg, you have to be the best. You have to be the best you can be. And never give up.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Ready, and, Action!
[Wiseau opens the rooftop door and steps into the scene. He pauses for several seconds]
Tommy Wiseau: What line? What is the line?
Sandy Schklair: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
Tommy

Wiseau: Okay.
[Wiseau returns to the rooftop exit]

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Greg Sestero: I wish we could just make our own movie.
Tommy Wiseau: That great idea.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Greg Sestero: [to Carolyn, after she fainted on the set] Can I ask you something?Why do you do it? You've got a husband, grand-kids. You live fifty miles out of town. And you're waking up at 5, driving all this way, for what?
Carolyn Minnott: We're actors, Greg. For you, me, people like us, even the worst day on a movie set is better than the best day doing

anything else.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Justin Hammer: Come here, Tommy. Just because you want it doesn't mean it can happen. Okay? It's one in a million, even if you have Brando's talent. It's not going to happen for you, okay? But now you have to go.
Tommy Wiseau: [upset] But, maybe I... maybe.
Justin Hammer: I'm not saying "maybe", I'm saying "not in a million years"!


Tommy Wiseau: But after that?
Justin Hammer: And *not* after!

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[as Claudette in "The Room"]
Carolyn Minnott: I got the results of the test back. I definitely have breast cancer.

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

[Tommy orders Juliette off the set for make-up after seeing a pimple on her shoulder]
Greg Sestero: W-what are you doing? Why are you acting like this?
Tommy Wiseau: I make American movie. She needs to look sexy. Beautiful!
[Greg grabs Tommy off the set]
Greg Sestero: Come here. Fuck, man.
Tommy

Wiseau: I know I'm hard on her.
Greg Sestero: Yeah, you're hard, but it's not just that. What's going on with you?
Tommy Wiseau: Stanley Kubrick, he nice to actors? Alfred Hitchcock? Let me tell you something, Greg. He do this movie, Birds.
Greg Sestero: Yeah, I'm aware of The Birds.
Tommy

Wiseau: On this movie, he terrify actors. He locked them in room, he throw, he throw birds at them. Real birds! Nasty stuff. The actors, they crack every day. But this movie win every award. Is Mr. Hitchcock bad man? No. He great director!
Greg Sestero: Yeah, but he was an asshole, and I bet he didn't direct with his fucking dick out.
Tommy

Wiseau: Oh, really? Well, maybe we check the record, okay? And you know, for your information, where director come from, dictator. Rest my case.
Greg Sestero: You can't treat them like this! it's not right!
Tommy Wiseau: I treat them how I treat them! If anyone needs to be upset here, it's me, quite frankly.
Greg

Sestero: Wait - why?
Tommy Wiseau: I give them job, I give them salary. I already spent five million dollars on this movie, Greg.
Greg Sestero: My God, are you kidding me? Five million dollars...?
Tommy Wiseau: And they are not grateful! Nobody respect my vision! I know what they say, Greg. I hear them. Nobody trust

me. Not even you, Greg!
Greg Sestero: That's... what are you...
Tommy Wiseau: Oh, see? You don't even trust me!
[Tommy proceeds to walk back into the set]

The Disaster Artist
The Disaster Artist

Juliette: It's still going?