Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Dale Doback: Please leave us alone Mr. Gardocki!

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Title Card: Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream. -George W Bush

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Brennan Huff: I have a belly full of white dog crap in me, and now you lay this shit on me?

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Dr. Robert Doback: Oh God, you're impressive.
Derek: Oh, come on. I love talking to you from across the room. I feel like we have a thing. You and me, man! You're my new stepdad! You're unbelievable!
[Robert laughs giddily]
Nancy Huff: I-I've never heard that laugh before.
Dale Doback: Dad, why are you

acting so weird?

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Denise: Brennan, I thought you were incredibly brave. And I mean that in strictly the most clinical and professional sense possible, with no emotional, intimate, sexual, or any other undertones that you could possibly infer.

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Dale Doback: Chewbacca masks!

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Dale Doback: What is your problem, man?
Derek: My problem? I don't know. I don't have a problem, uh, Dale. In fact, I have the opposite of a problem. I made over 550K last year. How much did you make?
Dale Doback: It's not about money.
Derek: It's not about money? Well, for me, it's a little about money, and I

made *that* much money last year.

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Brennan Huff: Holy Thing from the Fantastic Four's shit!

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

Dr. Robert Doback: [to Dale and Brennan on why it is their fault for divorcing Nancy] You destroyed my boat, you beat me up in your sleep, and... worst of all, you made Nancy and I resent each other! IT IS ABSOLUTELY ONE-HUNDRED AND FIFTY PERCENT YOUR FAULT!
Derek: Of course it's their fault. They are the two biggest dickheads in the world and they're

living in your house!

Step Brothers
Step Brothers

[last lines]
Brennan Huff, Dale Doback: [simultaneously getting out of bed to go sleepwalking; mumbling indistinctly]
Dale Doback: You got my passport?
Brennan Huff: What?
Brennan Huff, Dale Doback: [both mumbling indistinctly]
Dale

Doback: I'm good.
Brennan Huff, Dale Doback: [both mumbling indistinctly]
Dale Doback: All right.
Brennan Huff, Dale Doback: [both mumbling indistinctly]
Dale Doback: Don't worry, I'm not gonna be late. Don't worry.