Woman Fan: This guy next to me is doing something very weird in his raincoat.
[the Monstars arrive at the gym]
Monstar Bupkus: I'm here!
Monstar Blanko: Me too.
[he hits his head on a backboard, then puts his hands over most of his face]
Monstar Blanko: That hurt!
Daffy Duck: Oh, fear clutches my breast!
Muggsy Bogues: What are you saying? That I'm trying to disobey my mama?
Psychiatrist: I didn't say that. You did, Muggsy.
Muggsy Bogues: But I love my mama.
Larry Johnson: I've been MRI'd, EKG'd, X-Rayed, Laser beamed...
Jeffrey Jordan: Did everyone get mad at you?
Michael Jordan: No, worse. Everyone was real nice about it.
Player: That was a strikeout, Mike. But that was a good-looking strikeout. Real good.
Player: I mean, you look good when you strike out, man. When I strike out, it looks nasty, man. But at least you look good, man.
Nerdluck Pound: You ever heard of the Dream Team? Well, we're the Mean Team, wussy man.
Stan Podalak: [after all of his attempts to dig to find Michael have failed] This is it! THIS IS IT! I don't know where you are, Michael! But wherever you are, you obviously enjoy bein' there more than spendin' time with me!
Daffy Duck: [after Stan enters the Toon Squad dressing room burned to a crisp by the Monstars] Looks like Stan just had a close encounter with a bug zapper.
Michael Jordan: Someone has to go to my house and pick up my basketball gear.
Daffy: To your house? In 3-D land?
Mr. Swackhammer: [after the Monstars have lost] Losers!
Monstars: Sorry.
Mr. Swackhammer: Choke artists!
Monstars: Sorry again.
Mr. Swackhammer: Wait'll I get you back on Moron Mountain!
Bugs: Okay, okay, which one of you maroons has ever played basketball?
Bugs: Yeah, sure, let the little pipsqueaks knock themselves out.
Bugs: These little pipsqueaks just turned into superstars!
Daffy Duck: l have, coach. And there's an important question l must ask you.
