Tony Vivaldi: What is this, Benedict? First you're my friend; now you turn a... 360 on me!
Benedict: 180, you stupid, spaghetti-slurping cretin - *180*! If I did a 360, I'd go completely around and end up back where I started!
Tony Vivaldi: What?
Benedict: Trust me!
[shoots him]
Dekker: And you promised me you wouldn't tell!
Jack Slater: I didn't.
Dekker: Well, then how did he know?
Danny Madigan: "Jack Slater I".
Dekker: What's winning got to do with this?
Danny Madigan: No. The very first "Jack Slater".
Dekker:
[to Jack] You told your dad?
Jack Slater: I didn't tell anybody! I don't even know this kid!
Dekker: Well, he sure seems to know a lot about us.
Jack Slater: [hearing Mozart on the radio] ... Shhh can you turn that up? What is that?
Danny's mom: It's Mozart...
Jack Slater: [looks at Danny and whispers] ... The one Practice killed?
Danny's mom: You like Mozart?
Jack Slater: [smiles] ... I don't know, but I think I will... Wow.
The Mayor: Jack, as mayor of this great metropolis, you and I have had our little tiffs, but this is the Lieutenant Governor.
Lt. Governor: Slater, here's what I...
Jack Slater: [breaks the Lieutenant Governor's nose] When the Governor gets here, call me.
Ripper's Agent: Did Nicholson show up for the premiere of "Batman" dressed as the Joker? I don't THINK so!
Danny Madigan: Wait a second. Where you going?
Jack Slater: I'll be back!
[pause]
Jack Slater: Ha! You didn't know I was gonna say that, did you?
Danny Madigan: That's what you always say?
Jack Slater: I do?
[sigh]
Danny Madigan: Everyone keeps
keeps waiting for you to work it in. It's kind of like your calling card.
Dekker: You suck the blood outta cottonpickin' toes I can take from you! I got the California Raisins cast is doing an all-male version of The Diary of Anne Frank doing the all-male version in my frizza sibba! Tiny Tim has stepped onto a totem, so what? You ball peen jackameenis, I'll slap the mouth-outtall the cocksuckin' tales I can take from you! Fridda feen? You know, you take
the mayor in the library bush; you're never gonna azizza bazizzes down at the beach; go down to the beaches, y'know? You take the chicken out the bag and stick it UP!
Whitney Slater: FREEZE! Lose the guns or I redecorate in brain-matter grey, got it?