110 Easy A Quotes (2024) #2

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: I could have chlamydia. I have been... whoring around a lot.
Mrs. Griffith: No, honey. No, you haven't. Because a real whore can't even admit it to herself, let alone another person.

Easy A

Dill: [to his adopted son] Where are you from originally?

Easy A

Gossipy Girl: Oh my God, did you hear that Brandon ran away from home? Yeah. Totally. He left his parents a note that said: Fuck you, I'm gay. And then he skipped town with a big, hulking black guy!
Olive Penderghast: [to herself] My apologies to Mark Twain.

Easy A

Woodchuck Todd: Hey Olive! You left your glass slipper at the party the other night.
Olive Penderghast: Yea and I got pumpkin all over my dress too. C'est la vie.
Woodchuck Todd: La vie.
Olive Penderghast: Nice! Solid joke.

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: A is for Awesome.

Easy A

Rhiannon: You're being pretty cavalier about this. Aren't you supposed to be eternally in love with him and shit?
Olive Penderghast: Yes... I believe so, if I was the Gossip Girl in Sweet Valley of the Traveling Pants.

Easy A

[from trailer]
Rosemary: I had a similar situation when I was your age. I had a horrible reputation.
Olive Penderghast: Why?
Rosemary: Because I slept with a whole bunch of people. Mostly guys.
Olive Penderghast: Mom!

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: I used to be anonymous, invisible to the opposite sex. If Google Earth were a guy, he couldn't find me if I was dressed up as a 10-story building.

Easy A

Woodchuck Todd: [in Woodchuck costume carrying head] Hey Olive.
Olive Penderghast: Oh my God! The illusion is shattered! This is exactly why they put you in the gas chamber if you take your head off at Disney World.
Woodchuck Todd: Actually I think they just, you know, they fire you. You're thinking of Disneyland. Disney World is

much more liberal.
Olive Penderghast: Oh yeah! I always forget Disney World went blue in the last election.

Easy A

Dill: [walking into Olive's bedroom while she is sewing red "A" s on her clothing] Is everything all right? It sounds like you're having sex in here, which I know can't be true due to the fact that you have a homosexual boyfriend.

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: [V.O] So the next day I had detention. Which, thanks to recent budget cuts meant *cleaning*. I was looking forward to putting all this behind me - I had done the crime, I was going to do the time. And that would be that
Brandon: Aren't there, like, child labor laws against this?
Olive Penderghast: Not in high

school. The principal is like a captain of a ship in international waters. He can even marry people!
[Brandon nods]
Olive Penderghast: We haven't talked in a while - how've you been, Brandon?
Brandon: [sarcastic] Fabulous! Crushing it! Everything according to plan.
[yelling]
Brandon: I wanna be in detention!

Olive Penderghast: Ya, why are you here? Judging from the amount of blood I saw gushing from your nose I thought you were the bull-*ied*
Brandon: You'd think, but Principal Gibbons is a homophobe, which is why I called him a fascist.
Olive Penderghast: So the rumors are true.
Brandon: [defensive] I don't

know what you're talking about.
Olive Penderghast: I meant about Gibbons' being a fascist.
[smiles]

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: Let the record show that I, Olive Penderghast, being of sound mind and below average breast size, swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth... starting now.

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: Let me just begin by saying that there are two sides to every story. This is my side, the right one.

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Olive Penderghast: [about Natasha Bedingfield's "Pocketful of Sunshine"] Blech! Worst song ever!

Easy A

Mrs. Griffith: I'm the guidance counselor. I should know all the students, especially the ones that dress like prostitutes.

Easy A

Dill: After we watch "The Bucket List," remember to cross "watch 'The Bucket List'" off our bucket list.

Easy A

Eighth Grade Olive: [Olive and Todd are playing a kissing game, in a small room together; Voice-Over] The first time was back in 8th grade when all I wanted was a kiss from this guy I had always had a crush on. Todd and I were thrown together in Seven Minutes of Heaven.
Eighth Grade Olive: So, I think this is the part where you're supposed to stick your

tongue in my mouth. It's just what I've heard.
Eighth Grade Kid: [nervously] Just give me a second, okay?.
Eighth Grade Olive: [looks at her watch, they have 6 minutes and 22 seconds left] According to my watch, you have 382 of them.
Eighth Grade Kid: How do you do that?
Eighth Grade Olive: What?

Eighth Grade Kid: Add so fast. And you also talk like a grown up.
Eighth Grade Olive: Don't worry. I'm not nearly as smart as I think I am.

Easy A

Olive Penderghast: [welcoming Brandon into her upstairs bedroom] Welcome. This is where the magic happens. And as we all know, by "magic" I mean "nothing."

Easy A

Rosemary: That boy from yesterday just dropped this off for you...
Olive Penderghast: Well, put it in the pile of gifts from my other suitors.
Rosemary: He seems like a nice kid. He seemed a little incredibly gay...
Olive Penderghast: Dyed in the wool homosexual, that boy is.
Rosemary:

I just want you to know your father and I are totally supportive. We love you no matter what the sexual orientation of your opposite-sex sex partner...
Olive Penderghast: We are not dating, Mom.
Rosemary: ...and don't worry about not making us grandparents. Although we were kind of hoping you'd get "knocked up" so we'd have a second shot at raising

kids, really do it right this time.
Olive Penderghast: Bye now...
Rosemary: You know, I dated a homosexual once. For a long time, actually... a "long" time...
Olive Penderghast: Dear God, dear Lord, tell me you didn't marry and have children with him!
Rosemary: [Giggles] No.
Olive

Penderghast: [Sarcastically imitates laughing] Ha...
Rosemary: No, no. Your father is as straight as they come. A little too straight, if you know what I mean, girlfriend.
Olive Penderghast: I don't...