As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: How do you write women so well? I think of a man and I take away reason and accountability.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Carol Connelly: Do you have any control over how creepy you allow yourself to get?
Melvin Udall: Yes I do, as a matter of fact. And to prove it, I have not gotten personal, and you have.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Carol Connelly: How are you?
Simon Bishop: Don't ask. I'm tired of my own complaints. I need to get some new thoughts.
Carol Connelly: Why? What are you thinking about now?
Simon Bishop: How to die, mostly.
Carol Connelly: To think that in our little mix you're the good roommate.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: [to Verdell the dog] Don't be like me. Don't you be like me!

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Simon Bishop: Lucky for you... you're here for rock-bottom. You absolute horror of a human being.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: Just what the world needs, another actress.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Carol Connelly: You're going to die soon with that diet. You know that, right?
Melvin Udall: Oh, we're all going to die soon. I will, you will, and it sure sounds like your son will.
Carol Connelly: If you ever mention my son again, you will not be able to eat here any more, Mr Udall. Do you understand me? Give me some sign you

understand me, you sick fuck!

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: I will tell you why the dog prefers me, now. It's a trick! I carry bacon.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: I need you to chaperone, separate everything but cars. You said you liked convertibles! Now, I'm on the hook.
Carol Connelly: I'm sorry, "the stiff one eye"?
Melvin Udall: Two days!
Carol Connelly: I can't, I work.
Melvin Udall: You get off when you want to.

Carol Connelly: My son.
Melvin Udall: Bettes says he's doing fine.
Carol Connelly: ...Melvin, I'd rather not.
Melvin Udall: What has that got to do with it?
Carol Connelly: Funny, I thought it was a strong point.
Melvin Udall: Write a note, isn't she sweet? I

need a hand and where'd she go?
Carol Connelly: Are you saying accepting your help obligates me?
Melvin Udall: Is there any other way to see it?
Carol Connelly: ...No.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: You like sad stories? Wanna hear mine?

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Simon Bishop: Is this fun for you? You lucky devil. It just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it? I'm losing my apartment, Melvin. And Frank, he wants me to beg my parents, who haven't called me, for help. And I won't. And... I... I don't want to paint any more. So the life that I was trying for, is over. the life that I had is gone, and I'm feeling so damn sorry for myself

that it's difficult to breathe.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Simon Bishop: Okay... What I do is, I watch. Ever watch somebody who doesn't know you're watching them? An old woman sitting on a bus? Or kids going to school? Somebody just waiting, and you see this flash come over them. And you know immediately that has nothing to do with anything external because that hasn't changed. They're just sort of realer and more alive. You look at

someone long enough, you discover their humanity.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: You know, they let you in with a housedress, yet they make me find a jacket.
[Carol gets up to leave]
Melvin Udall: Whoa, whoa, where are you going?
Carol Connelly: Pay me a compliment, Melvin. I need one. You have no idea how much that hurt my feelings.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: [tentatively] I'm gonna grab you.
[beat]
Melvin Udall: I didn't mean for that to be a question. I'm gonna grab you.
[awkwardly kisses Carol]
Melvin Udall: I know I can do better than that.
[kisses Carol again, intently and passionately]
Carol Connelly: Better. Definitely

better.
Melvin Udall: See?

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: I've got Jews at my table.
Carol Connelly: It's not your table, behave! This once, you can sit at someone else's station.
[all the other waitresses gasp]
Carol Connelly: Or you can wait your turn.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Carol's Date: Just a little too much reality for a Friday night.

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: I'm dying here.
Simon Bishop: Because you love her.
Melvin Udall: No! And you people are supposed to be sensitive and sharp?

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: [finishing his latest romance novel] "'You saved my life,' she said... 'You'd better make it up to me.'"

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Melvin Udall: As long as you keep your work zipped up around me, I don't give a rat-crap what or where you shove your show. Are we done being neighbors for now?

As Good as It Gets
As Good as It Gets

Carol Connelly: A compliment is something nice about somebody else.