Will: I was in some strange territory. Was I frightened? I was petrified.
Will: [Will is in the supermarket. His father's song "Santa's Super Sleigh" begins to play over the speakers]
Will: Ah, shit! It can't be. November the sodding 19th... Six weeks before Christmas and already they were playing the bloody thing.
Lindsey's Mum: Are we having duck? Delicious!
Fiona: When you sing it brings sunshine and happiness into my heart
Rachel: Will, how do you use this blender thing?
Will: You don't.
Will: Hello Barney.
[Barney blows a raspberry]
Will: Yeah.
Will: [to Marcus] I'll tell you what I am. I'm the guy who's really good at choosing trainers or records, OK? That's it. I can't help you with real things. I can't help you with anything that means anything.
Marcus: I think I killed a duck!
Will: In my opinion, all men are islands. And what's more, now's the time to be one. This is an island age.
Marcus: He fancies you. he told me.
Will: I want to go out with her, OK. I'd like her to be my girlfriend, here I said it.
Marcus: How brilliant!
Rachel: Ali has trouble meeting new people. You see, the last guy I went out with, well, he wasn't all good news.
Ali: [loudly] He was a liar!
Rachel: All right Ali.
Will: [voiceover] There. She was gone. There was no more to say.
Mr. Chalmers, the M.C.: That was Def Penalty Kru, with "Murder for Life."
Rachel: Allie finds all this rather difficult.
Will: Well yeah, so does Marcus. Don't ya mate, divorced parents and not knowing how to feel about new people.
Marcus: Absolutely. That's absolutely the way I feel.
John: What about you, Will? Any desire for a family of your own yet?
Will: [voiceover] I'd rather eat one of Barney's dirty nappies.
Fiona: You selfish bastard!
Will: [Responding to game show question on tv] Jon Bon Jovi, too easy. And, if I may say so, a complete load of bollocks.
