[Charlie enters Poppy's Theater, wearing landmine equipment]
Poppy: You're late. Why are you still wearing that?
Charlie: Until you get rid of the perimeter landmines, I'll keep wearing the suit, thank you very much.
Poppy: Scaredy-cat. Shut up and sit down. Let's go!
[Poppy turns on the stage lights, revealing Elton
John]
Charlie: 'Crocodile Rock', please.
Elton John: Fuck you!
[Poppy zaps Elton with the collar around his neck]
Poppy: Hey, hey, Elton. Language. Okay, well, as fabulous as your catalogue is, I think I want to hear some Gershwin.
[Elton sighs and plays the piano]
Charlie: I still can't
believe you got away with kidnapping Elton John.
Poppy: I know! But with Valentine abducting those celebrities, it seemed silly not to take advantage of the confusion.
Charlie: Shit! Has Elton got the blue rash?
Poppy: Lights.
[Elton stops playing the piano as the theater lights turn on]
Poppy:
Hey, Elton, have you been a bad boy again?
[Elton shakes his head as Poppy approaches the stage]
Poppy: You're lying. Look at your hands.
[Elton notices the blue rash on his hands]
Elton John: What is it?
Poppy: It's proof that my plan is gonna work. It's also the first sign of a slow and horrible death. Don't
worry, I can fix it. Tell me who you parties with.
Elton John: [sighs] It was Angel.
Poppy: Huh, not very angelic. Gonna have to clip his wings.
Jacob Black: Do you remember how much you wanted to be around me three days ago? That's gone now, right?
Bella Cullen: LONG gone.
Jacob Black: Because it was her. From the beginning, it was Nessie who wanted me there.
Bella Cullen: [shouts furiously] Nessie? You nicknamed my daughter after the Loch Ness
MONSTER?
[Bella lunges at Jacob again. Seth, in wolf form, jumps at Bella to protect Jacob. Without breaking stride, Bella bats Seth aside, and into a tree]
Jacob Black: Seth, are you okay?
Bella Cullen: [immediately regretful] Seth, I'm sorry.
Jacob Black: He'll be all right. Bella, you know me better than anyone. All
I want is for Ness...
[Bella starts scowling again]
Jacob Black: ...Renesmee to be safe. Happy. Look, nothing ever made sense before. You, me, any of it. And now I understand why. This was the reason.
[Bella sighs in resignation]
Becky: Tell me what you want, as fast as it comes to you.
Gilbert: Uhh...
Becky: Okay?
Gilbert: 'Kay.
Becky: Okay. What do you want?
[He's thinking about it]
Becky: Faster!
Gilbert: Okay. I want a new thing. House. I want a new
house. And a family.
[He sighs heavily]
Gilbert: I want Momma to take aerobics classes. I want Ellen to grow up. I want a new brain for Arnie. I want...
Becky: What do you want for you? Just for you?
Gilbert: I want to be a good person.
Grug: Don't. It could be dangerous.
Eep: Dad, you always say that.
Guy: Careful.
Eep: Oh, okay.
[Grug sighs in exasperation]
Bagheera: Baloo, birds of a feather should flock together. You wouldn't marry a panther now, would you?
Baloo: I don't know.
[laughs]
Baloo: Come to think of it, no panther has ever asked me. Ha-ha.
Bagheera: [getting irritated] Baloo, you've got to be serious...
Baloo: Oh, stop
worrying, Baggy! Stop worrying! I'll take care of him.
Bagheera: Yes, like you did when the monkeys kidnapped him, huh?
Baloo: Can't a guy make one mistake?
Bagheera: Not in the jungle! And another thing, sooner or later Mowgli will meet Shere Khan.
Baloo: The tiger? What's he got against the kid?
Bagheera: He hates man with a vengenance. You know that! Because he fears man's gun and man's fire.
Baloo: But little Mowgli don't have those things.
Bagheera: Shere Khan won't wait until he does. He'll get Mowgli while he's young and helpless. Just one swipe!
Baloo: Oh! Well, what... what are we going to
do?
Bagheera: Do what's best for the boy.
Baloo: You better believe it! You name it, I'll do it.
Bagheera: Good. Then make Mowgli go to the man-village.
Baloo: Are you out of your mind? I promised him that he could stay here in the jungle with me.
Bagheera: Well, that's just the
point! As long as he remains with you, he's in danger! So, it's up to you.
Baloo: Why me?
Bagheera: B-because he won't listen to me.
Baloo: But I love that kid.
[sniffs]
Baloo: I love him like he was my own cub!
Bagheera: Then think what's best for Mowgli, and not
yourself.
Baloo: Uh... well, can't... well, can't I wait until morning?
Bagheera: It's morning now. Go on Baloo.
[Baloo sighs and approaches Mowgli who is asleep]
Baloo: Oh boy!
Lex Luthor: [DELETED SCENE: at his underground manor, Luthor is playing the piano and singing] "You must've been a beautiful baby, you must've been a wonderful child; when you were only startin' to go to kindergarten, you must've drove the little boys wild; And when it came to winning blue ribbons, you must've shown the other kids how; I can see the judge's eyes, when he handed
you the prize, you must've made the cutest bow; Yeah, you must've been a beautiful baby... 'Cause, baby, look at you now."
[He looks over at Eve T., who is about to be fed to Lex's "babies"]
Miss Teschmacher: [in tears] You can't do this to me...! Why, Lex? WHY?
Lex Luthor: Because I love you, Miss Teschmacher.
[He signals for Otis to
drop Eve, which the henchman does. Then a familiar blue-and-red streak follows her down... and reappears, depositing Eve safely on the floor]
Superman: By the way, Miss Teschmacher, your mother sends her love.
[He gazes over at Luthor, who sighs in defeat]
'Stab' Casey: [Phone rings; "Casey" picks it up] Hello?
Phone Voice: [distorted voice] Hello.
'Stab' Casey: [unaffected] Who is this?
Phone Voice: Guess.
'Stab' Casey: No, really. Who is this?
Phone Voice: Were you expecting somebody?
'Stab'
Casey: [looks over at popping corn] No...
Maureen Evans: [frustrated loud voice] Bitch, hang up that phone and *69 his ass! Damn!
Phil Stevens: [turns to her; puts finger to lips] Shhhhh!
'Stab' Casey: Who is this?
Phone Voice: [distorted] Who would you like it to be?
'Stab'
Casey: I don't like games. Who is this?
[Walks away from stove and above from where she was, a figure appears with music, scaring the moviegoers]
Phone Voice: Look out back. Do you see your boyfriend anywhere?
'Stab' Casey: I don't even have a boyfriend right now.
[looks visibly more frightened]
Phone
Voice: [menacing] Would you like one?
Maureen Evans: [frustrated whisper] Damn it all.
[normal voice]
Maureen Evans: Can I - give me some money. I need to get some popcorn.
Phil Stevens: You got money.
Maureen Evans: I got my money. I asked fo' your money.
Phone
Voice: What do y'say?
[Phil, annoyed, gets out the money]
Phil Stevens: [Soft mutter] Cheap ass.
Maureen Evans: [grabs the money] Thank you.
[Phil looks back at her without affection and turns back to the film]
Phone Voice: Come on. Cat got your tongue?
'Stab' Casey: You know, I
don't even know you, and I dislike you already.
Maureen Evans: [Maureen sighs as she closes the doors and goes toward the popcorn stand; gets startled as movie audience screams and walks over to counter amidst comments about the movie] Hi, um, can I have a medium popcorn, no butter, and a small diet Pepsi?
Popcorn Boy: [small smile and friendly] You
got it.