Wreck-It Ralph Quotes

Surge Protector: Step aside, sir. Random security check.
Wreck-It Ralph: Random, my behind. You always stop me.
Surge Protector: I'm just a surge protector doing my job, sir. Name?
Wreck-It Ralph: Lara Croft.
Surge Protector: Name?
Wreck-It Ralph: Wreck-It Ralph.

Surge Protector: And where you coming from?
Wreck-It Ralph: Uh, "Pac-Man."
Surge Protector: You bring any fruit with you?
Wreck-It Ralph: [hides the giant cherries behind his back] No! No, no fruit.
Surge Protector: Okay, then, where you headed?
Wreck-It

Ralph: Uh, "Fix-It Felix, Jr."
Surge Protector: Anything to declare?
Wreck-It Ralph: I hate you.
Surge Protector: I get that a lot. Proceed.

[last lines]
Wreck-It Ralph: [voice-over] But the best part of my day is when the Nicelanders throw me off the roof. Because when they lift me up, I get a perfect view of "Sugar Rush," and I can watch Vanellope racing. The kid's a natural, and the players love her, glitch and all, just like I knew they would.
[Over at Sugar Rush, Venellope wins her race, receives her

trophy, and fist-bumps the girl playing the game]
Wreck-It Ralph: Turns out I don't need a medal to tell me I'm a good guy. Because if that little kid likes me...
[Vanellope, holding her trophy, smiles and waves at Ralph. Ralph waves back, smiling contentedly]
Wreck-It Ralph: How bad can I be?

[Ralph returns to Vanellope with the fixed go-kart]
Wreck-It Ralph: I know, I know, I know. I'm an idiot.
Vanellope von Schweetz: And?
Wreck-It Ralph: A real numb-skull?
Vanellope von Schweetz: And?
Wreck-It Ralph: A selfish diaper-baby.
Vanellope von

Schweetz: AND?
Wreck-It Ralph: A stinkbrain?
Vanellope von Schweetz: The stinkiest brain ever.

[first lines]
Wreck-It Ralph: My name's Ralph, and I'm a bad guy. Uh, let's see... I'm nine feet tall, I weigh six hundred and forty-three pounds. Got a bit of a temper on me. My passion bubbles very near the surface, I guess, not gonna lie. Anyhoo, what else? Uh... I'm a wrecker. I wreck things, professionally. I mean, I'm very good at what I do. Probably the best I know.

Thing is, fixing's the name of the game. Literally. "Fix-It Felix, Jr." So yeah, naturally, the guy with the name Fix-It Felix is the good guy. He's nice enough as good guys go. Definitely fixes stuff really well. But, uh, if you got a magic hammer from your father, how hard can it be? If he was a regular contractor, carpenter guy, I guarantee you, you will not be able to fix the damage that I do

as quickly. When Felix does a good job, he gets a medal. But, are there medals for wrecking stuff really well? To that, I say, ha! And no, there aren't. For thirty years I have been doing this, and I have seen a lot of other games come and go, it's sad. Think about those guys at Asteroids? Boom, gone. Centipede? Who knows where that guy is, you know? Look, a steady arcade gig is nothing to sneeze

at, I'm very lucky. It's just, I gotta say, it becomes kinda hard to love your job... when no one else seems to like you for doing it.

Wreck-It Ralph: [Referring to his medal] I didn't win it in my game, I won it in Hero's Duty.
Vanellope von Schweetz: 'Hero's Doodie'? Pffffft!
[giggles loudly]
Wreck-It Ralph: It's not that kind of duty!
Vanellope von Schweetz: [Still laughing] I bet you really gotta watch where you step in a game

called 'Hero's Doodie'! What did ya get the medal for? Wiping? I hope you washed your hands after you handled that medal!
Wreck-It Ralph: I don't have time for this.
Vanellope von Schweetz: One more, one more. Why did the the hero flush the toilet?... Say why.
Wreck-It Ralph: Why?
Vanellope von

Schweetz: Because it was his... doodie!
Wreck-It Ralph: How dare you insult Hero's Duty, you little guttersnipe! I earned that medal! And you better get it back for me toot-sweet sister!
Vanellope von Schweetz: Well unless you've got a kart hidden in the fat folds of your neck, I can't help you.

Fix-It Felix: Do you have any idea what you put me through? Higgeldy-piggeldy, I ran all over creation looking for you! I almost drowned in chocolate milk mix! And then... I met the most dynamite gal. Oh, she gives me the honey glow something awful! But, she rebuffed my affections. And then, I GOT THROWN IN JAIL!
Wreck-It Ralph: Felix, pull yourself

together!
Fix-It Felix: No, Ralph! You don't know what it's like to be rejected and treated like a criminal.
Wreck-It Ralph: Yes I do... That's every day of my life.
Fix-It Felix: It is?
Wreck-It Ralph: Which is why I tried to run away and be a good guy. But I'm not! I'm just a bad guy. And I need your

help. There's a little girl who's only hope is this cart. Please, Felix, fix it. And I promise, I will never try to be good again.

Clyde: Question, Ralph. We've been asking you to Bad-Anon for years now, and tonight you finally show up. Why is that?
Wreck-It Ralph: I dunno, I just felt like coming. I mean, I suppose it has something to do with the fact that uh... well, today's the 30th anniversary of my game.
Saitine: Happy anniversary, Ralph.

Wreck-It Ralph: Thanks Satan.
Saitine: Uh, it's "Saitine".
Wreck-It Ralph: Got it. But here's the thing... I don't wanna be the bad guy anymore.
[the Bad-Anon members gasp]
Cyborg: You can't mess with the program, Ralph!
M. Bison: You're not going Turbo, are you?

Wreck-It Ralph: Turbo? No, I'm not going Turbo! Common guys! Is it "Turbo" to want a friend? Or a medal? Or a piece of pie every once and awhile? Is it "Turbo" to want more out of life?
Zombie: Yes.
Clyde: Ralph, Ralph, we get it. But we can't change who we are. The sooner you accept that, the better off your game and your life will

be.
Zangief: Hey, one game at a time, Ralph.
Clyde: Now let's close out the with Bad Guy affirmation.
Clyde, Saitine, Cyborg, M. Bison, Zombie, Zangief, Bad-Anon Members: I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be

good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be then me.