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Sam: [Ken is wearing a neck brace] What do you do to your neck?
Kenneth Bowden: Oh, this? I don't have to wear it all the time.
[looks out the window and takes it off]
Kenneth Bowden: There was an insurance guy around here earlier.

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Suzie: Sure took you guys long enough to get here. What if someone was trying to strangle me, or... fuck me up the ass or something?

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Kenneth Bowden: [Passing Sandra Van Ryan's limo and honking the horn] Hey, look who we've got here. Hey, Sandra!
Sandra Van Ryan: I want you to nail that shyster's balls to the wall!
Tom Baxter: Well, that might have been possible if miss not-so-bright here hadn't started throwing things in court.
Kelly Van

Ryan: Fuck off!
Sandra Van Ryan: I can't believe you're going to let them, get away with this... shit!
Tom Baxter: I don't think you understand, Sandy. Your little princess here committed perjury. It will be all I can do to keep her fucking little ass out of jail.
Sandra Van Ryan: Well... what are we going to do?

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Suzie: [TV Version] You - you are gonna blow me over, aren't you?

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Kelly Van Ryan: [in a voice laden with sexual innuendo, as she and Nicole prepares to wash Sam's Jeep] So where's your hose, Mr. Lombardo?
Sam: The hose, Kelly, is right in front of my Jeep.

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Gloria Perez: What about asking her to take a polygraph?
Detective Ray Duquette: What about asking the Pope to take a piss test? This is Blue Bay, Gloria. You ask a Van Ryan to take a lie detector test and Tom Baxter'll cut you off at the knees.

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District Attorney Bryce Hunter: [watching the videotape of Kelly Van Ryan's statement where she claims she was raped by Sam Lombardo] "No little girl can ever make me come", Jesus. Too bad, we might have had some physical evidence.

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Sam: [taking off Kelly Van Ryan's panties] Guidance counselors get to find out all sorts of interesting things.

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Kenneth Bowden: Leonor, would you see Mr. Lombardo out, please?
[Ken's law office is so small that the entrance is only a few steps away]
Ken's Secretary: [doesn't get up from her desk] Goodbye, Sam.

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Kelly Van Ryan: He said "Don't worry, I didn't come." I can't forget that. He said "No little girl can ever make me come."

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[repeated line]
Kenneth Bowden: [to Suzie] Did you enjoy being a guest of the state?

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District Attorney Bryce Hunter: The conversation on this tape is totally unintelligible. What we have here, is you on the Van Ryan property, without a proper warrant, shooting a porn flick!

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[first lines]
Kelly Van Ryan: Fuck off!

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Sam: We've gotta stop. I'm gonna cum.
Kelly Van Ryan: That never seemed to worry you out at the Glades.

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Detective Ray Duquette: Did Sam Lombardo rape you?
Suzie: Yeah, Okay? He did. He pushed me to the floor and he did it to me.

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Sam: [looking at a photo] Hey Art, this is one hell of a fish.
Art Maddox: It's a Barracuda. If you weren't so busy chasing booty at the yacht club, you could have caught one for yourself.
Sam: You aren't going to eat that thing are you? It's Barracuda, it's poisonous, it'll kill you.
Art Maddox: Shit, man. I

could say that about most of the girls you date.

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Ruby: Walter! You get sick, it'll serve you right.
[to Ray and Gloria]
Ruby: Found some teeth in a trailer down the road. He says they'll fit.

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Kenneth Bowden: [into an intercom] Hold my calls, Leonor.
Ken's Secretary: [pops her head over the partition separating her area from Ken's in the tiny office] OK, Mr. Bowden.

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Kenneth Bowden: Nice to see you, Tom. Come by, we'll have lunch.
Tom Baxter: See you at the club.
[Tom Baxter leaves. Ken takes the out-of-court settlement document Baxter's client Sandra Van Ryan has signed and starts rubbing it all over himself including under his arms and over his crotch and bottom]
Kenneth Bowden: See you

at the club. See you at the club. See you at the club. See you at the club, Tommy. Hey, Tom! What'd you shoot today, pal? Hey, my man!

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Sam: I'm innocent, Godammit!