The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: Every red-blooded American knows that the only condiment that you are ever supposed to put on a hamburger is KETCHUP! Or MAYBE some of that SPECIAL SAUCE you like so much here in Canada; which I think has a little bit of mayonnaise in it too! But I swear to God when they start slapping that mayonnaise on there I could kill somebody.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy 'The Tulip' Tudeski: You're a dentist?
Oz: Afraid so.
Jimmy 'The Tulip' Tudeski: You suicidal?
Oz: Why would you say that?
Jimmy 'The Tulip' Tudeski: Well, I read that dentists are prone to suicide.
Oz: Look, Jimmy, I may hate my life, but I certainly don't

want to die.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Cynthia: But he knows I don't want to be married to him anymore, and like I said, he doesn't believe in divorce.
Oz: But murder he's okay with.?
Cynthia: It's what he does.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: You're a lucky guy, Oz.
Oz: Why would you say that?
Jimmy: You're about to find out if the woman you love loves you. You know, if it were me, in her position, I'd just take the money and run.
Oz: So what are you betting on?
Jimmy: I'm betting on love. Love for you means money for

me. And like I said before, I'd really hate to have to kill you.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jill St. Claire: I'm still a virgin. I mean I haven't killed anyone yet.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: [speaking about Oz] You are the most chivalrous guy I've ever met.
Jill St. Claire: Do you see why I couldn't kill him?
Jimmy: I love him!

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Oz: [after Frankie beats a confession out of Oz] I MAY know where he is.
Frankie Figs: Well, all right. But don't tell me. Let's go tell Janni.
Oz: Okay. You mind if I piss a little blood first?
Frankie Figs: Please, by all means.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: [after finding out Oz slept with his wife] I'll tell you one thing. You got balls.
Oz: Yeah. Who knew?

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Sophie Oseransky: You do this for me, and I give you your divorce. And if you don't do this for me, I swear I'll make your life so damn miserable it will make these past few years look like a pleasure cruise.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Oz: [Jimmy just shot Frankie Figs] Why did you kill him?
Jimmy: [Jimmy throws the gun into the river] Well, I had to kill one of you.
Oz: Well, then you definitely made the right decision. But why did you have to kill him?
Jimmy: Well, if I didn't kill you, Frankie would have. Then he would have figured I'd

gone soft, and eventually come after me and the money.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

[Sophie is driving Oz to the airport; he is on the phone with Jill]
Jill St. Claire: Are you going alone?
Oz: Yes.
Jill St. Claire: Good, can you do me a huge favor while you're there? Go out, and get laid.
Oz: Jill!
[covers the phone]
Jill St. Claire: And call me the

second you get back. Better yet, call me right after. Call me during! I want all the details!

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: [after Oz makes him laugh] You sure you're a dentist?
Oz: Yeah. Why?
Jimmy: Because I've never met a dentist I liked.
Oz: Well, I try to keep things as painless as possible.
Jimmy: Me, too.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

[at the bank, Jill proposes double-crossing Jimmy, splitting the money, and running]
Jill St. Claire: What do you think?
Cynthia: I think... I know, that if we did, Jimmy would kill Oz.
Jill St. Claire: So what? Think about it, Cynthia. We're talking about five million dollars each, here.
Cynthia:

[realizes] The thing is... I think I love him.
Jill St. Claire: You think? Sweetheart, for five million dollars, you'd better be damn sure!
Cynthia: [smiles] I am. I'm sorry, but... I love him.
Jill St. Claire: You do?
Cynthia: [laughs] Yeah.
Jill St. Claire: [grins back] That's

the right answer.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Janni Gogolack: Expecting a call?
Cynthia: Explain to me how that's any of your business.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Oz: Uh... it's room service. Before I vomited I ordered scotch.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Frankie Figs: Aren't you gonna cry out for help?
Oz: Would it do any good?
Frankie Figs: ...No.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jimmy: Friends do not engage in sexual congress with each other's wives.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Frankie Figs: Oz, I just wanted to be sure it was you. Everybody's inside. By the way,
[grabs his crotch]
Frankie Figs: Huevos grandes, amigo!

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Jill St. Claire: [on Sophie] You know, you'd be doing the world a favor if you just had her whacked.

The Whole Nine Yards
The Whole Nine Yards

Janni Gogolack: My father is a great man. A man of wision, and character. A man who stood up for his beliefs. Unlike that rat FUCK, piece of SHIT... Tudeski.