Ralphie Cifaretto: I hate to do it, Artie. But I think I'm gonna pass.
Artie Bucco: Why not?
Ralphie Cifaretto: 'Cause if you don't pay me back, I ain't gonna be able to hurt ya.
Ralphie Cifaretto: ...and I know I'm the guy who's dating your mom,
Jackie Aprile Jr.: Dating?
Ralphie Cifaretto: Don't get fuckin' filthy about it.
Feech La Manna: What's yours is your Pauly, but what ain't, belongs to anybody else.
Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri: Oh, what do you know about what belongs to who? You been in prison for twenty years.
Feech La Manna: Which entitles me to earn!
Paulie 'Walnuts' Gualtieri: Which entitles you to shit! In my book,
you get points for staying out.
Feech La Manna: Then it's a good thing, Paulie, that your book doesn't mean oogatz to me!
[a union leader won't go along with one of the Sopranos' schemes. Bobby is sent to fix the situation]
Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri: How's it going? You're the head of the union aren't you?
Union Leader: Yeah, I am. Who are you?
Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri: Just a casual observer. You know, I've been following the situation, and I gotta tell you, it
doesn't make much sense to me. I mean you recently got an offer, for a lot of money. And, if you don't get paid, you can't feed your family. I presume you got a family. I'm a family man myself, and I gotta tell you I'd rather take two shots to the back of the fucking head than not be able to feed my family.
[makes a gun with his hand and points it to the back of his own head]
Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri: One... Two... To the back of the head. You think about that.
Livia Soprano: [at the dinner table talking about AJ's behavior] Oh his father was the same way. I practically LIVED in that vice principal's office.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Could we not?
Livia Soprano: Oh well you only remember what you want to remember. I must have had another son who stole a car when he was ten years old.
[pause]
Livia Soprano: Yeah, he could barely see over the steering wheel.
Christopher Moltisanti: Whatever you do, do not engage Silvio in conversation.