She's the Man Quotes

Viola: [as Sebastian] I gotta be completely honest. The whole dissecting thing kinda freaks me out, so uh... I think you may have to take the reins on this one.
Olivia: Wow, most guys would have never admit that.
Viola: Oh crap! You're right.
Olivia: No, don't worry I think it's refreshing.

Viola: You do?
Malcolm: [interupts] No paper near the bunsen burner.
Viola: Wait!
Olivia: What's this? poems?
Viola: Lyrics. They're his... my, my old stuff.
Olivia: [reading] "Wake up I've been waiting for you".
[Finishes]
Olivia:

Those are really good. So honest.
Viola: I know. I keep telling him... me... meself... my... myself.
Malcolm: I write songs too, Olivia.
Olivia: Really? Wonderful.
Malcolm: Check it out.
[sings]
Malcolm: I see you through your window, while I'm standing on a tree outside

Duke: [Using one of Viola's tampons after getting into a fight with Justin at the carnival] Oh, yeah, I uh, borrowed one of your... yeah... and you're right, they really do work.
Viola: Oh my god you're hurt...
[clears throat]
Viola: I mean, suck it up, be a man and rub some dirt on it
Duke: Okay, I'll

rub some dirt in it...

[sees Olivia switch kissing booth places with Viola]
Duke: Just my luck.
[sees look on Viola's face]
Duke: No, no, no, no. I didn't mean it like that. I just mean, she's... you know... Ok. Um, on the other hand you're also...
Viola: I am? Thanks, I, guess.
9 Year Old Boy: You don't have to flirt

with her first, okay, genius? You're paying for it.
Duke: Haha, why don't you just - relax.
[to Viola]
Duke: Um, um, um- maybe I should kiss you now, I gave that girl my ticket and I waited in line.
Viola: Well, it's the least I can do.
Duke: Uh, ok - here I go. Um - uh...
[They kiss]

Duke: Ok, I think that was one ticket's worth.
Viola: Na-uh, you need a little bit more.
[she kisses him again]

Viola: I get to take a shower. I get to take a shower.
Malcolm: [startled gasp then realizes he forgot to introduce himself] Malcolm Festes, Dorm Director. Shower shoes are to be worn in the bathroom at all times except when in the actual shower... Did you not read your "Dorm Life" pamphlet? It was in your cubby.
[Duke walks in and hits Malcolm

behind the head with a towel. Malcolm emits a high-pitched squeal]
Viola: Sup dog?
Duke: Yeah, what's kickin', homie?
Viola: Later.
Duke: Hey, you forgot, ew...
[holding up Viola's chest bandage]
Duke: This, coolio.
Viola: Word, g-money.

Monique: Sebastian!
[Monique mistakes Viola for Sebastian]
Viola: Ow!
Monique: Eww... It's you. God you and your brother look scarily alike from the back. I think it's your total lack of curves.
Viola: Hey Monique, it's so good to see you too!
Monique: Hmm. I'm looking for

Sebastian. Where is he?
Viola: I don't know.
Monique: Just remind your brother how lucky he is to be in my life. And tell him to give me a all if he wants to stay in it, okay?
Viola: Okay. Does he have your number? 1-800-BEE-OTCH?
[laughs to herself]
Monique: [mimicks Viola] Nyenyenyenyenyeh?

Viola: She will do great things.

Viola: [as Sebastian] Hey. HEY! What up? You must be my room-mates.
Duke: [laughs]
[Viola clears throat]
Duke: What-what's your name?
Viola: Sebastian Hastings.
Duke: Duke Orsino.
Viola: [grunts]
Duke: Um, ok, ok, ok, ok! Um, this

is Andrew and Toby. They live next door.
Andrew: Yeah, freshman dorms thattaway, twiglet.
Toby: Seriously, how old are you?
Viola: I skipped a couple of grades. I'm brilliant, shh! Anyway, you know when our soccer try-outs start?
Duke: Noon. You play?
Viola: Absolutely.

Centre-forward. You know it, bra. So, uh, you play the beautiful sport, bro? Brothers? Brethren?
Duke: Yeah, I'm a striker. Andrew and Toby are half-backs.
Viola: Schveet!
Duke: Ok, w-why do you have tampons in your boot?
Viola: Um, I get really bad nose bleeds?
Andrew: So you

stick 'em up your nose?
Viola: Yeah! What, you've, you've never done that?
[Boys shake head]
Viola: Oh my! Beckhem does it all the time.
Duke: Serious?
Viola: Yes. Look, let me show you how to do it. Take that off and whatever that is, and, and you stick it right in. It absorbs right up!

Duke: That's disgusting!
Andrew: Oh my god! You're room-mates a freak!

Justin: [kisses Viola] Ok, you are really getting good.
Viola: Aw, you too. I mean when we first started going out, you couldn't kiss at all.
Justin: I meant at soccer.
Viola: Aw, really?
Justin: Absolutely. You're already better than half the guys on my team.

Viola: Hmm... probably more than half.
[kisses justin]
Justin: What do you mean I couldn't kiss at all?
Viola: Don't worry, I've taught you well.

Olivia: You're right.
Viola: I know.
Olivia: The next time I see Sebastian, I am gonna march right up to him...
Viola: You march.
Olivia: ...I'm gonna tell him how I feel...
Viola: You tell him.
Olivia: ...and then I'm going to kiss him so

passionately...
Viola: What?
Olivia: ...that even the people he hates will feel pleasure.

Coach Dinklage: [about to assign shirts and skins] OK, shirts and skins!
Viola: Pardon me, sir. I have to be a shirt.
Coach Dinklage: What?
Viola: I'm allergic to the sun.
Coach Dinklage: ...You're allergic to the sun?
Viola: Very, very, very deathly, deathly

allergic.
Coach Dinklage: Well, we like to accomodate here in Illiria, so I'll follow you around with a parasol. Alright, Nancy boy?
[looks at his clipboard]
Coach Dinklage: You're a shirt.