I married the man I love when the state of California said I could. We made a family through adoption, as New York State said we could. From the outside, our family - two dads, two sons via adoption - seems like an experiment, but what family isn't an experiment?
Children's books deal in idealized worlds, so they're a document of how our notion of ideal worlds has changed over time.
One of the many American ideals that make no sense at all is that we're all a million rugged individualists marching in lockstep. We dress accordingly, at least the men. If it's always been thus, I yearn for the halcyon days of the man in the gray flannel suit because at least that guy had some flair.
I am a binge reader, with a tendency to throw myself at a writer, immerse myself in their work.
Everyone on Twitter - everyone on the Internet - seems so damn certain. Brevity doesn't allow for nuance, and it's a nice complement to confidence.
Every Christmas, I cook an elaborate Mexican dinner.
Men's fashion's tendency toward uniformity promises little fun, but at least it offers this: If I wear sweatpants and sneakers, I can pass as the American it's safest to be.
I love fiction's ability to allow me to inhabit a wholly different life.
Parenting is love, sure, but it's as much about receiving love as it is giving it. Parenthood is a kind of vanity.
I know I've had a charmed experience of being a parent, with healthy kids, a helpful partner, access to good day care, and great public schools.
Checking your phone during dinner is no less rude than reading 'People' during dinner, which I once saw a woman do at Blue Ribbon Brooklyn as she dined with her husband/boyfriend/whatever.
Lindsay Hatton's novel 'Monterey Bay' so beautifully evokes the landscape of the titular locale, you'll feel transported to Northern California even if you're reading it on the bus on your morning commute.
History is a story like any other, but black history is a story so devoid of logic that it frustrates the young reader. The young readers in my house, told of slavery and segregation, asked in disbelief, 'What? Why?' We - the parents of black children, the parents of all children - still need to tell that story.
Children are weird. I was going to say 'most children,' but I think this a rare universal law.
My husband and I adopted our children through a private agency, Spence-Chapin Services to Families and Children. As a nonprofit organization, it relies on client fees as well as donor support to do its work.
Parenting advice is mostly useless because every family is uniquely its own; artistic advice is mostly useless because every artist works in their own way. Thus, figuring out how to balance the two has an intense specificity.
If writing really is empathy, then understanding your place in society might actually help you achieve it.
Fashion has underscored the interchangeability of men for a long time, maybe from the outset.
A writer cannot be judged for his project, only its execution.
I mourn for the kind of dad I didn't have; I rue my first broken family while taking joy in the one that I've made.
