Ready Player One Quotes

Halliday: I created the OASIS because I never felt at home in the real world. I just didn't know how to connect with people there. I was afraid for all my life, right up until the day I knew my life was ending. And that was when I realized that... as terrifying and painful as reality can be, it's also... the only place that... you can get a decent meal. Because, reality... is

real.

Aech: [Discussing Parzival's upcoming date with Art3mis] Z, you gotta be more careful about who you meet out on the OASIS.
Parzival: Aech, Art3mis gets me. She'll get my outfit, there's just this connection. I mean, sometimes, we even...
Aech: Finish each other's sentences.
Parzival: Yeah!

Aech: We have that, me and you.
Parzival: Yeah, I know. But that's because we're best friends, dude.
[Puts hand up for a high-five]
Aech: She could be a dude too, dude.
Parzival: Nah, come on.
Aech: I'm serious. She could actually be a 300 pound dude who lives in his momma's

basement in suburban Detroit. And her name is Chuck.
[Puts hand on Parzival's shoulder]
Aech: Think about that.

Wade: Sho?
Sho: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm 11, so what?
Daito: His real name is Xo.
Sho: But everyone else calls me Sho, no big deal.
Wade: No. It is a big deal. Sho, you're the world's most badass 11-year-old ever.
Daito: He knows.
Sho: Shut

up! Let him tell me.

IOI Board Member: Who is this 'Parzival' and how the hell is he winning?
Sorrento: Well, here's a better question. Who cares? Halliday's contest is vitally important. I mean, it's nothing less than a war for control of the future. But this Parzival? He's not even clanned up. He's alone. We have an army.
Corporate Businessman: And

yet, he's got the first key.
Sorrento: Yeah, he has a key, but you have to get three of 'em to win the contest.
IOI Board Member: [interuppting] Our stock dove 6% yesterday.
Sorrento: [strictly] Loyalty division is reporting profits of 28%! F'Nale?
F'Nale Zandor: We're opening five new loyalty centers

this month.
Sorrento: [sternly] Debt Services dwarfs Hardware. Now, you really wanna talk to me about stock prices?
Corporate Businessman: The shareholders won't be happy.
Sorrento: It's not our job to make them happy. It's our job to make them money, but once we launch this little baby, they're gonna *flip*.
[taps on

the screen to planet doom]
Sorrento: [gunshots shooting on screen] We call this Pure O2. This is the first of our planned upgrades. Once we can roll back some of Halliday's ad restrictions, we estimate we can sell up to 80% of an individual's visual field before inducing seizures, so picture this...
IOI Board Member: All of this implies we win the

contest.
Sorrento: [looks up to him] Indeed, it does.

[Ending Narration; Last lines]
Wade: The High Five took over the OASIS, and the first thing we did, was sign Ogden Morrow to a non-exclusive consultancy. The salary, per his demand, was 25 cents. One quarter.
[Wade flips the quarter in the air]
Wade: With his guidance, our second move was to ban any loyalty centers from accessing the OASIS.

IOI had no choice. They shut 'em all down. The third thing we did wasn't as popular. We closed the OASIS on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I know it sounds like a weird move, but, people need to spend more time in the real world. 'Cause, like Halliday said, reality, is the only thing. That's real.