70 Monsters University Quotes (2024)

Monsters University

Johnny: Enjoy the attention while it lasts, boys. After you lose, no one will remember you.
Mike Wazowski: Maybe. But when you lose, no one will let you forget it.
Chet: Oh, boy. That is a good point.

Monsters University

[as the Oozmas are watching the Scare Floor at Monsters Inc. in order for Mike to show them what it takes to be Scarers, they soon get caught by the Security Guards with their flashlights]
Security Guard: Hey, what are you doing up there?
Art: [Panicking] I can't go back to jail!

Monsters University

Sulley: I act scary, Mike. But most of the time, I'm terrified.
Mike Wazowski: How come you never told me that before?
Sulley: Because we weren't friends before.

Monsters University

[Mike and Sulley are working in the mail room at Monsters Inc]
Yeti: Alright, newbies. Quit goofing around. I'll have you know that tampering with the mail is punishable by banishment.
Sulley: Yes Sir.
Mike Wazowski: We're right on it Mr. Snowman.

Monsters University

Young Mike: I found a nickel! Sure wish I had pockets.

Monsters University

Slug: I can't be late on the first day!
[Starts huffing and puffing as he crawls at a slow rate]

Monsters University

Mike Wazowski: [Before the First Scare Games Challenge starts] Squishy. We're not gonna lose, because we have everything we need to win right here.
[points to his chest]
Squishy: [smiling] Heart.
Mike Wazowski: No, me! I'm gonna win the race for us.

Monsters University

Dean Hardscrabble: It's my job to make great students greater, not make mediocre students less mediocre.

Monsters University

Mike Wazowski: Um, h... hello? Fellas?
[as he and Sulley walk down the basement into a candlelit are, where O.K fraternity surround it, wearing black cloaks]
Don: Do you pledge your souls to the Oozma Kappa brotherhood?
Mike Wazowski: [Terri and Terry hit Mike with a cricket bat] OW!
Terry: Do you swear

to keep secret.
Terri: All that you learn here?
Art: No matter how horrifying?
Sulley: [Squishy hits Sulley with cricket bat] Hey!
Squishy: Will take the scared oath of the...
[initiation interrupted by someone, turning on the lights]
Don: For crying out loud.

Ms. Squibbles: Sweetie! Turn the lights on when you're down here. You're going ruin your eyes.
Squishy: MOM, WE'RE DOING AN INITIATION!
Ms. Squibbles: Oh, scary! Well, carry on. Just pretend I'm not here
[turns off half the lights, and walk downstairs to the washing machine]
Squishy: This is my mom's

house. Do you promise to look out for your brothers?
[Mrs. Squibbles turns on the laundry dial loudly]
Squishy: No matter what the peril?
[Laundry machine runs noisily]
Squishy: ... WILL YOU DEFEND OOZMA KAPPA? NO MATTER HOW DANGEROUS? NO MATTER HOW INSURMOUNTABLE THE ODDS MAY BE? FROM EVILS BOTH GREAT AND SMALL? IN THE FACE OF UNENDING

PAIN AND... OH FORGET IT! You're in.

Monsters University

[Mike and Sulley are being escorted out of the door lab by the CDA after causing the door they went through to explode with the big scare]
Squishy: What's gonna happen to them?
Roz: That's for the university president to decide, but I can assure you we'll always be watching these two. Always watching.

Monsters University

[On the First Morning in the Oozma Kappa Fraternity home, Mike's lips press against Sulley's hand, and Sulley falls off the bunk after the alarm goes off]
Sulley: What happened?
Mike Wazowski: Your grubby paw was in my bed!
Sulley: Were you kissing my hand?
Mike Wazowski: [laughs] No! And what about you

with all your shedding?
Sulley: I don't shed.
Mike Wazowski: Really?
[punches the mattress of the top bunk and Sulley's hair falls everywhere]

Monsters University

Greek Council VP: [Referring to a Purple Glowing Urchin] Trust me when I say you are not gonna want to touch this bad boy!
Art: I wanna touch it!

Monsters University

Don: Want to join Oozma Kappa?
Squishy: We've got cake!
[a Big Monster walks by and eats the cake, every slice]

Monsters University

Don: Sherrie and I are engaged.
Mike Wazowski: Who's Sherrie?
Squishy: [Embarrased] She's my Mom.
Don: Don't worry, Scott. I don't want you to think of me as your new dad. After all, we're fraternity brothers first.
Squishy: This is so weird.
Don: Just think of

me as your big brother that's marrying your mother. Wait, hold on, we're brothers who share the same mom slash wife. That's worse.

Monsters University

Sulley: [to Mike, as he leaves the Campus] You're not scary. Not even a little bit. But you are fearless, and if Dean Hardscrabble can't see that, then she can just...
Dean Hardscrabble: [Interrupting] I can just... what? Careful, Mister Sullivan, I was just starting to warm up to you.
Sulley: ...sorry.

Monsters University

Sulley: You don't need to study scaring, you just do it.

Monsters University

Dean Hardscrabble: You two have managed to accomplish something together no one ever has: you surprised me.

Monsters University

Dean Hardscrabble: [Sulley tells Dean Hardscrabble and Professor Knight of how he rigged the Scare Simulator] You did what?
Sulley: My team had nothing to do with it. It was all me. I cheated.
Dean Hardscrabble: I expect you off campus by tomorrow.
Sulley: [in dismay] Yes ma'am.
Dean

Hardscrabble: You're a disgrace to this university... and your family name.