I don't think you can only have people with disability talking about the Paralympics. Clare Balding didn't need to be disabled to cover it.
I love my wife and daughters, but there are times you want to put them in the bin.
The owner of one club once interrupted my set to inform me that my taxi had arrived. I don't think he meant it to sound as cutting as it did.
I never finished looking at Twitter happier than when I've started looking at Twitter. And it's not because of abuse or anything. Even just refreshing what people are saying about you, I don't think is a healthy way to kind of perceive yourself.
If one of my friends said they'd written a little role for me in a sitcom, I'd definitely do it and I'd enjoy it. But I have no interest in being a serious actor.
There's enough really good actors out of work without me trying to steal any of it.
I'm one of life's pessimists. I'm ready for everything to go wrong at any moment.
As students, we completely failed with the washing up. You'd constantly have to eat out of the wrong receptacle. You'd end up with a cup of cornflakes or a plate of tea.
I'll never have a house party again. You stand around for ages worried that nobody's coming and the next minute you're queuing for your own toilet while someone you've never met is asking you if you know whose party this is.
Successful comedians are just as neurotic as I am.
The thing about stand-up is that you end up meeting your idols.
I loved 1990s television: 'The Fast Show,' 'Father Ted,' 'Harry Enfield.' 'Clive Anderson Talks Back.'
My favourite was 'Fantasy Football League.' I thought it would be the most exciting thing ever to be friends with Frank Skinner and David Baddiel.
I'm lucky that I don't have any big regrets. Maybe that undercut hairstyle from my youth.
I'd redo the 90s as they were a lot of fun.
I don't get hangovers - it's some kind of superhuman ability.
I don't get starstruck by Hollywood celebrities as I'm not into films.
I don't like thinking too much about the future - it freaks me out.
Always thinking that you're not very good is far better than being cocky.
I never feel like I should have any time free.
