Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half-empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Is being an idiot like being high all the time?

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

To me, there is no greater act of courage than being the one who kisses first.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

The world would be better off with multiple superpowers. When Communist USSR was a superpower, the world was better off.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I'm not specifically attached to anything other than trying to, in my personal life, fight against where I see right wing thinking. Whether it be around my dinner table or on the street or somebody reading the New York Post.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

To combat social awkwardness, I would just act like I couldn't be bothered - that kind of aloof persona or aloof demeanor. It's so off-putting.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Sometimes people say I'm a political comedian, which, actually I'm not. I'm a comedian who sometimes discusses politics, culture - again, the word 'politics' to me is just life.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Men are allowed to age. Men are allowed to gain weight. Men are allowed to be quirky looking.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

German accents and Hassidic accents aren't that romantic. They're more harsh. Although Hebrew, when spoken by certain people, sounds beautiful. There's this beautiful woman I know who speaks Hebrew, and when she speaks, it's so attractive. Maybe it's who's speaking it.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

TV, it's a director's medium, and they wanna make it look interesting. To be rehearsing mostly for the sake of where you're standing so they can do the lighting, that's what I don't like.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I don't enjoy sparring with the audience. It devastates me.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I was thrilled to work opposite Carl Reiner and Robert De Niro. Mr. Reiner was very chatty and delightful, but I learned that if you want Robert De Niro to like you, don't speak at all, and he'll be friendly to you.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

When I see the American flag, I go, 'Oh my God, you're insulting me.'

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I don't have a good work ethic. I have a real casual relationship with hours.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Here's what the right-wing has in, there's no shortage of the natural resources of ignorance, apathy, hate, fear. As long as those things are in the collective conscious and unconscious, the Republicans will have some votes.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

Tina Fey is part of a generation of women who have changed the face of comedy at 'Second City,' 'SNL,' in sitcoms and in film.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

If you aren't overly effusive or really nicey-nice with the press, you get a reputation for being outspoken or difficult.

Janeane Garofalo
Janeane Garofalo

I absolutely realize that a celebrity spokesperson is not ideal.