The brain knows the real secret of seduction, more effective than even music and martinis. Just keep whispering, 'Gee, you are really special' to that sack of water and protein that is a body, and you can get it to do practically anything.
Christmas Day itself hasn't always been great. My parents went abroad when I was very young, and I went to boarding school. We had a few Christmases before that - I remember a big sack of presents and Mummy cooking goose.
If the club decides to sack me, honestly, I don't feel this pressure.
As players, whenever the manager gets the sack, you have to look in the mirror and say it's not always the manager. It's down to the players.
We were playing a fair, and a few people were handing me stuffed animals and flowers, but one person handed me a paper sack. So I took all the stuff back to the bus. I put the sack in my lap and opened it, and a live iguana jumped out of the sack and onto my shirt. I screamed like a little girl!
I went in to Reading with the full backing of the chairman, who was great to me, and I got 20 games. Even though it was a three-year project, and I was the guy who knew the club more than anyone, I got the sack after 20 games. Funnily enough, it had just started to pick up, but they lost their patience.
I think one thing as far as my learning curve and what I'm learning - there is a time to take a sack, and then there is also a time to try to find a way to maybe throw the ball at a receiver's feet.
The safest course for public officials is simply to throw all of the money in a sack.
Actually, the Department of Transport were at one stage going to sack me.
When posh boys are in trouble they sack their servants.
