Queenie Quotes

John Bender: [after Claire performs her lipstick trick, claps sarcastically] Wow, Claire. That was great. My image of you is totally blown.
Allison Reynolds: You're a shit. Don't do that to her, you swore to God you wouldn't laugh.
John Bender: Am I laughing?
Andrew Clark: [shouts angrily] You fuckin' prick!

John Bender: What do you care what I think anyway? I don't even count, right? I could disappear forever and it wouldn't make any difference. I might as well not even exist at this school, remember?
[turns to Claire]
John Bender: And you... don't like me anyway.
Claire Standish: You know, I have just as, many feelings as

you do and it hurts so much when someone steps all over them.
John Bender: God! You're so pathetic. Don't you ever, *ever* compare yourself to me, okay. You got everything, and I got shit. Fuckin' Rapunzel, right? School would probably fuckin' shut down if you didn't show up. Queenie isn't here. I like those earrings, Claire.
Claire Standish: Shut

up.
John Bender: Are those real diamonds Claire?
Claire Standish: Shut up.
John Bender: I bet they are. Did you work for the money for those earrings?
Claire Standish: Shut your mouth.
John Bender: Or did your daddy buy those for you?
Claire Standish:

[shouts] SHUT UP!
John Bender: I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. Right? You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." All right? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?
Andrew

Clark: My God, are we gonna be like our parents?
Claire Standish: Not me. Ever.
[Bender nods]

Queenie: [Detroit, 2012] Let me get a 44, extra crispy!
Irate Customer: Yo! The medium bucket is supposed to have 8 pieces. This one has only 7.
Queenie: My name is not "Yo", it's "Queenie", and you must have miscounted because I packed that basket myself.
Irate Customer: Well, you must've got a D in Math 'cause there's only 7 pieces.
Queenie: Actually, sir, I got an A

in Math, all of them. Calculus, Trig, Advanced Algebra.
Irate Customer: [Sarcastically] Is that so?
Queenie: Mm-hmm.
Irate Customer: Look, I'm sure you're a genius, just give me an extra piece of chicken and I'll be done here.
Queenie: Look, pencil dick, you ate the extra piece and, now, you want a freebie!
Irate Customer: I'd like to speak to the manager, stupid

fat ass!
Queenie: [Pissed] What did you call me?
Irate Customer: Get the manager!
Queenie: [Angrily] I am the manager.
Irate Customer: [She sticks her hand in the burning hot oil, with her "Human Voodoo Doll" Power transferring the pain to the customer; He screams in agony as his whole hand and forearm burn] Help! I'm burning! Help!
[He continues screaming in

agony]
Nan: [Cutting to present day with Queenie recounting the incident] Did they send you to jail?
Queenie: No. There were lots of witnesses, none of them had actually seen me throw the oil. But it made the local newspaper, that's how Miss Cordelia found me.
Cordelia Foxx: You didn't want to join us at first.
Queenie: I grew up on white girl shit like "Charmed" and

"Sabrina, The Teenage Cracker". I didn't know that there even were black witches. As it turns out, I'm an heir to Tituba. She was a house slave in Salem. She was the first to be accused of witchcraft. So, technically, I'm part of your tribe.
Madison Montgomery: [Sarcastically] Is this were we all sing Kumbaya?
Queenie: [Jumping to her feet, ready to fight] Bitch, I will eat you!

Cordelia Foxx: Hey hey hey! Hey! You guys have got start taking care of each other. We have enough enemies on the outside.