Murtaugh Quotes

Martin Riggs: I didn't know that.
Roger Murtaugh: What?
Martin Riggs: That it was your birthday today.
Martin Riggs: Yesterday.
Martin Riggs: Well, happy birthday for yesterday.
[no response]
Martin Riggs: I mean that, sincerely, happy birthday, man.

Roger Murtaugh: [grudgingly] Thanks.
Martin Riggs: Maybe we'll stay alive long enough for me to buy you a present.
[pause, then Murtaugh laughs, finally loosening up]

[Riggs and Murtaugh pull up outside Dixie's house to check out a theory]
Roger Murtaugh: Like I said, thin.
Martin Riggs: Probably nothing.
[the house explodes, knocking them both to the ground. Murtaugh throws himself on Riggs]
Martin Riggs: What are you, a fag?
Roger Murtaugh: Your coat's on

fire!
[Riggs throws it off, then both of them look at the burning house]
Martin Riggs: Probably nothing!
Roger Murtaugh: Thin, very thin!

[after the envoys states that Murtaugh can't go to South Africa because he's black]
Roger Murtaugh: Of course I'm black. That's why I want to go to South Africa.
Roger Murtaugh: [louder and more militant] To join my oppressed brothers as they take up the struggle against this racist, fascist, White Minority Regime!
Leo Getz:

Fascist White Regime!
Roger Murtaugh: One man, one vote!
Leo Getz: One man, one vote!
Roger Murtaugh: [Very loud] FREE SOUTH AFRICA you *dumb son of a bitch*!
Leo Getz: You *dumb son of a bitch*!
Consulate Envoy: Alright, I've had as much as I'm going to take! GET OUT!

[Security tries to remove Getz and Murtaugh, resuting in a full scale riot inside and outside the Consulate]

[about to pull Murtaugh off the booby-trapped toilet]
Martin Riggs: On three, what do ya say?
Roger Murtaugh: Okay.
Martin Riggs: One... two...
Roger Murtaugh: Wait, wait, wait!
Martin Riggs: What?
Roger Murtaugh: Do we do it on three? Or one, two, three,

then do it?
Martin Riggs: It's your ass, Cochise!
Roger Murtaugh: My ass, yeah. On three.
Martin Riggs: We go on three?
Roger Murtaugh: Yeah.

Martin Riggs: [a smoking Riggs and Murtaugh have been assigned to guard Leo] This stinks!
Capt. Murphy: I don't give a fuck, Riggs. That's why I don't have an ulcer, because I know when to say "I don't give a fuck."
[They go to leave]
Capt. Murphy: And Riggs.
Capt. Murphy: What?
[Murphy throws

Riggs a desktop no smoking sign]
Capt. Murphy: You know what that says?
Martin Riggs: Yeah, the same thing as that.
[Points to a no smoking sign on the door]
Martin Riggs: But I don't give a fuck.
[Riggs throws the sign back at Murphy, then leaves. Murphy and Murtaugh look at each other]
Roger

Murtaugh: You're lucky. I have to live with that.