The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Toll Road: [eating some bad food] Oh. This tastes like shit.
[to Caesar]
Toll Road: How's yours?
Hale Caesar: Can't complain about rigatoni. Plan ahead, fellas. That's all I have to say. Y'all, what if you knew you were going to die tomorrow? What would your last meal be? One choice.
Toll Road: One

choice?
Hale Caesar: It'd probably be cereal for you, huh?
Toll Road: What the hell's wrong with cereal?
Gunner Jensen: It's cliché.
Hale Caesar: You gotta be original. You know, if you were an original, broad-thinking man, you'd probably come up with some special cereal, like Earios. You know, just

like your ear. You know, pour milk on them suckers, they just lay there and you don't hear shit.
Toll Road: For the record, my hearing is 20/20.
Hale Caesar: Barney?
Barney Ross: Donuts and most food that kills ya.
Hale Caesar: That's deep, man.
Barney Ross: [chuckles] You think

so?
Hale Caesar: Maggie?
Maggie: Crispy aromatic duck with plum sauce. Very sexy.
[short pause]
Maggie: But I like Italian, too.
Hale Caesar: I'm starting to think Italian's overrated.
[everyone laughs]
Gunner Jensen: Hey. What about me? My favorite Swedish dinner

would be, baby seal, and whale ass, in the summer.
[to Maggie]
Gunner Jensen: But I'd really die for some Chinese.
Barney Ross: Then you're gonna starve to death.
[everyone laughs]

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas, Barney Ross, Gunner Jensen, Hale Caesar, Toll Road: Beware, beware, walk with care / Care for what you do / Or mumbo jumbo's gonna hoo-doo you / Mumbo jumbo's gonna hoo-doo you / Boom-lay, boom-lay, boom-lay boom!

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Maggie: I can get him to talk, and without so much effort.
[opens a large manicure/pedicure kit]
Lee Christmas: What's she gonna do, give him a pedicure?

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: I thought you were the Lone Wolf.
Booker: Sometimes, it's fun to run with the pack.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas: [Billy is running up the hill] Remember when you could do that?
Barney Ross: No, do you?

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Gunner Jensen: Booker. You're the one people call the Lone Wolf?
Booker: I've been called that. But I have mellowed.
Barney Ross: [looks at the Sang soldiers Booker just killed] Not that much.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

[Lee's cell phone rings]
Barney Ross: [mockingly] "Hello, darlin'."
Lee Christmas: Hello, darlin'.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Vilain: You must want to hurt me bad.
Barney Ross: I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm gonna take your life.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Hale Caesar: [driving around abandoned war-torn streets] This is weird.
Gunner Jensen: It's like home.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: What are you doing here?
Booker: Moving on. You killed all my business.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Gunner Jensen: [the bomb's fuse goes out] Well, the phosphorus must have been damp.
Lee Christmas: Yeah, right.
Toll Road: Or you suck.
Hale Caesar: There's that.
Maggie: Don't cry, Gunner.
Barney Ross: You almost had an idea.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Gunner Jensen: [as Yang and the Chinese millionaire jump out of the plane] Now that's some real Chinese take out.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Vilain: You wanna kill me like a man? Or you wanna kill me like a sheep? So. What's it going to be? Man or sheep?
Barney Ross: You wanna man up? I'll man you up.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: Trench?
Trench: Oh, this is embarrassing.
Barney Ross: Yeah, it sure is.
Lee Christmas: What's he doing here?
Trench: Saving this Chinese billionaire.
Barney Ross: Oh, yeah? That's funny. So are we.
Trench: Well, then we have

a scheduling problem, don't we?
[to Gunner]
Trench: Cut me loose, Frankenstein.
Barney Ross: Don't get nuts, Gunner. Do it.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Vilain: Imagine if 6 pounds of pure plutonium is powerful enough to change the balance of the world. So, imagine what 5 tons would do.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: Christmas, my friend. Please tell me you ain't going through this.
Lee Christmas: Of course I am. Look at that girl. Who wouldn't marry her?
Barney Ross: She cheated on you.
Lee Christmas: It was a half-cheat.
Barney Ross: Which is?
Lee Christmas:

The other side of a half-truth. The facts are murky.
Barney Ross: Murky. I hate to break this to you, pal, but your girlfriend over there has a world-class cheating gene.
Lee Christmas: I should stab you in the heart.
Barney Ross: Too late.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: I got an idea. And your ego, I think you're gonna love it.
Lee Christmas: My ego?
Barney Ross: Your ego.
Lee Christmas: What do you mean, my ego?
Barney Ross: You've got a big ego.
Lee Christmas: Well, check your ego out.
Barney

Ross: Oh, please. Your ego is like the size of a dinosaur. Huge.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Maggie: Can I ask you something?
Barney Ross: Sure, go ahead.
Maggie: Why are you so nervous around me?
Barney Ross: I don't get nervous, Maggie.
Maggie: Then what is it?
Barney Ross: I just like keeping a distance.
Maggie: Is it because

you don't want to know anymore people?
Barney Ross: Let's just say bad things have happened to people I've gotten close to.
Maggie: Not a good way to live.
Barney Ross: [nods] I know.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas: You're not doing what I think you're doing.
Barney Ross: Yeah, I am.
Lee Christmas: Let's do it!
[Barney intentionally rams and crash lands his plane into the plutonium mine, Maggie nearly falls out and Gunnar saves her]
Lee Christmas: You're gonna need a new plane.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Maggie: [to Ross] If you need me, call me, or you're dead.