The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: I've heard another rumor, that you were bitten by a king cobra?
Booker: Yeah, I was. But after five days of agonizing pain, the cobra died.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Trench: I'll be back.
Church: You've been back enough. I'll be back.
[leaves]
Trench: Yippee-ki-yay.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: Why is it that one of us who wants to live the most, who deserves to live the most dies, and the ones that deserve to die keep on living? What's the message in that?

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Pilar: Who you are?
Barney Ross: We're Americans.
Lee Christmas: Since when?
Gunner Jensen: Swedish.
Hale Caesar: Blackfoot.
Maggie: Chinese.
Toll Road: Retards.
Barney Ross: [to Toll Road] You done?

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas: [dressed as a priest] By the powers vested in me, I now pronounce you man and knife.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Trench: [Church pulls up in a SmartCar] My shoe is bigger than this car.
Church: Shoot something!

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Trench: I need a weapon. Something big.
[looks at Caesar's gun]
Trench: Yours.
Hale Caesar: Whoa, whoa, whoa. My big weapon's hangin' right where it is.
Barney Ross: Come on, Caesar. You got a backup.
[Caesar reluctantly hands over his gun]
Hale Caesar: If I don't get this

back, your ass is terminated.
Trench: In your dreams.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Trench: [to Booker] Who's next? Rambo?

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: Rest in pieces.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: That's how we deal with death. We can't change what it is, so we keep it light until it's time to get dark. And then we get pitch black.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Gunner Jensen: I got a plan. Everybody calm down. Phosphate rock.
Lee Christmas: What's he doing?
Barney Ross: Probably making a bomb.
Lee Christmas: You serious?
Barney Ross: Ask him.
Lee Christmas: What you doing, Gunner?
Gunner Jensen:

I'm making a bomb. You mind?
Barney Ross: A maniac with brains.
Lee Christmas: Scary.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Barney Ross: [seeing their new plane] That thing belongs in a museum.
Trench: We all do.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

[as Yang leaves]
Gunner Jensen: Who am I gonna pick on?
Yin Yang: You find some other minority.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas: What's the plan?
Barney Ross: Track him, find him, kill him.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Lee Christmas: [while the Sangs are attacking the Expendables] Can you hold them off?
Barney Ross: Yeah, maybe with a tank.
[the Sangs appear with a tank]
Barney Ross: Oh, shit.
Lee Christmas: What?
Barney Ross: They've got a tank.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

[last lines]
Lee Christmas: From one friend to another...
Barney Ross: What?
Lee Christmas: You really need to learn how to fight.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Vilain: [to Billy] Are you afraid of me?
Bill 'The Kid' Timmons: No, I'm not.
Vilain: You should be.
[Hector quickly props a knife against Billy's chest and Vilain kicks it into his chest]

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

[from trailer]
Trench: I'm back!

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Vilain: [after kicking Barney down] Over so soon? I want my money's worth! Come on! Get up!
Barney Ross: Coming right up.
[Barney attempts to rise, but Vilain kicks him down again]
Vilain: Going back down.

The Expendables 2
The Expendables 2

Church: Did you win?
Barney Ross: I think so.
Trench: Well, where's the proof?
Barney Ross: [Pulls out Vilain's head in a bag] Heads up.
[Chucks head onto the ground]
Trench: Nice touch.