Regan: But ya like him.
Chris MacNeil: Of course I like him. I like pizzas, too, but I'm not gonna marry one.
Father Dyer: My idea of Heaven is a solid white nightclub with me as a headliner for all eternity, and they *love* me.
Father Merrin: [looking at the Pazuzu Amulet] Evil against evil.
Dr. Klein: Do you keep any drugs in your house?
Chris MacNeil: No, of course not, nothing like that.
Dr. Klein: Are you sure?
Chris MacNeil: Well, of course I'm sure. I'd tell you. Christ, I don't even smoke grass.
Lt. Kinderman: If certain British doctors never asked "What is this fungus?" we wouldn't today have penicillin, correct?
Father Karras: There isn't a day in my life when I haven't felt like a fraud. I mean priests, doctors, I've talked to them all. I don't know anyone who hasn't felt that.
Chris MacNeil: Would you like some brandy in that, father?
Father Merrin: Well, my doctor says I shouldn't, but thank God my will is weak.
Chris MacNeil: Oh no, that was no spasm. I got on the bed. The whole bed was thumping and rising off the floor and shaking. The whole thing, with me on it!
Dr. Klein: Mrs. MacNeil, the problem with your daughter is not her bed; it's her brain.
Chris MacNeil: We've got rats in the attic. You better get some traps.
Karl: Rats?
Chris MacNeil: Mm-hmm. 'Fraid so.
Karl: But the attic is clean.
Chris MacNeil: All right, then we've got clean rats.
[last lines - 2000 version]
Father Dyer: You know, you look a bit like Bogart.
Lt. Kinderman: You noticed.
Chris MacNeil: Operator, you've given me the number four times. What did you do, take an illiteracy test to get that job for Christ sake?
[first lines]
Boy: [in Arabic] They've found something... small pieces.
Demon: [as Father Merrin enters the house, with terrible rage] MERRIN!
Burke Dennings: Shall we summon the writer? He's in Paris.
Chris MacNeil: Hiding?
Burke Dennings: Fucking.
[to a prominent senator at Chris' party]
Burke Dennings: There seems to be an alien pubic hair in my gin. Never seen it before in my life! Have you?
Regan: Captain Howdy, do you think my mom's pretty?... Captain Howdy?... Captain Howdy, that isn't very nice!
Chris MacNeil: Well, maybe he's sleeping.
Karl: It wants no straps.
Lt. Kinderman: [to Chris] A draft in the fall when the house is hot is a magic carpet for germs.
Chris MacNeil: How does a doctor end up as a priest?
Father Karras: It's the other way around; the Society put me through medical school.
