The Departed Quotes

[narrating first lines]
Frank Costello: I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me. Years ago we had the church. That was only a way of saying - we had each other. The Knights of Columbus were real head-breakers; true guineas. They took over their piece of the city. Twenty years after an Irishman couldn't get a fucking job,

we had the presidency. May he rest in peace. That's what the niggers don't realize. If I got one thing against the black chappies, it's this - no one gives it to you. You have to take it.

Frank Costello: Who let this IRA motherfucker in my bar?
[the man looks startled]
Frank Costello: [laughs] Only kidding. How's your mother?
Man in Costello's Bar: Oh... I'm afraid she's on her way out.
Frank Costello: [walks away] We all are. Act accordingly.
[smiles and his straightens tie]

Oliver Queenan: [during Costigan's interview] Do you know what we do here? My section?
Billy Costigan: Sir, yes, sir. I have an idea...
Dignam: [interrupting] Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's say you have no idea and leave it at that, okay? No idea. Zip. None. If you had an idea of what we do, we would not be good at what we do, now would we?

We would be cunts. Are you calling us cunts?
Oliver Queenan: Staff Sergeant Dignam has a style of his own. I'm afraid we all have to get used to it.

[upon learning the Police have found Delahunt's body and that he was a cop in Costello's bar]
Fitzy: I don't believe it.
Mr. French: What can't you believe?
Fitzy: I spent all fucking night dragging the poor bastard in there. Tell me how they find him so fast? Somebody walking a fucking dog ? What fucking size a dog is that?

Has to be a big fucking dog, man. I spent all night doing it man.
[pause, Frank stares at him]
Fitzy: I'm embarrassed. I still don't believe he was a cop, I don't believe it.
Frank Costello: The COPS... are saying he's a cop... so I won't look for the cop. Are you soft, Fitz? When I tell you... to dump a body in the marsh, you dump him *IN*

the marsh. Not where some guy from John Hancock goes every Thursday, TO GET A FUCKING BLOWJOB!
[Fitzy laughs, Frank hits him with his cap]
Frank Costello: Don't laugh! This ain't Reality TV!

Ellerby: [during a conference briefing about Costello and his crew] Staff Sergeant Dignam is our liaison to the the undercover department, his undercover work is extensive. He's here to give us his report. Sergeant Dignam.
Dignam: Ok. My people are out there. They're like fuckin' indians. You're not gonna see 'em you're not gonna hear about 'em except from

me or Captain Queenan. You will not ever know the identity of undercover people. Unfortunately, this shithole has more fuckin' leaks than the Iraqi Navy.
Ellerby: Fuck yourself.
Dignam: I'm tired from fuckin' your wife.
Ellerby: How's your mother?
Dignam: Good, she's tired from fuckin' my father.

Dignam: [during Costigan's interview] Your fuckin' family's dug into the Southie projects like ticks. Three-decker men at best. You, however, grew up on the North Shore, huh? Well, la-di-fuckin'-da. You were kind of a double kid, I bet, right? Huh? One kid with your old man, one kid with your mother. You're upper-middle class during the weeks, then you're droppin' your "R"s and

you're hangin' in the big, bad Southie projects with your daddy, the fuckin' donkey on the weekends. I got that right?
Dignam: [Billy does not answer] Yup. You have different accents? You did, didn't you? You little fuckin' snake. You were like different people.
Billy Costigan: You a psychiatrist?
Dignam: Well, if I was I'd

ask you why you're a Statie making 30 grand a year. And I think if I was Sigmund fuckin' Freud I wouldn't get an answer. So tell me, what's a lace-curtain motherfucker like you doing in the Staties?
Billy Costigan: Families are always rising or falling in America, am I right?
Oliver Queenan: Who said that?
Billy Costigan:

Hawthorne.
Dignam: [Dignam makes a farting sound] What's the matter, smartass, you don't know any fuckin' Shakespeare?

Oliver Queenan: [during Costigan's interview] We have a question: Do you want to be a cop, or do you want to appear to be a cop? It's an honest question. A lot of guys just want to appear to be cops. Gun, badge, pretend they're on TV.
Dignam: Yeah, a lot of people just wanna slam a nigger's head through a plate-glass window.
Billy

Costigan: I'm all set without your own personal job application. Alright, Sergeant?
Dignam: What the fuck did you say to me, trainee?
Billy Costigan: [to Queenan] With all due respect, sir, what do you want from me?
Dignam: Hey asshole, he can't help you! I know what you are, okay? I know what you are and I know what

you are not. I'm the best friend you have on the face of this earth, and I'm gonna help you understand something, you punk. You're no fuckin' cop!

Billy Costigan: [to the bartender] Cranberry juice.
Man Glassed in Bar: It's a natural diuretic. My girlfriend drinks it when she's got her period. What, do you got your period?
[Billy grabs an empty glass and smashes it onto the man's head. Mr. French grabs Billy throws him against the wall. Billy tries to go towards the man again and French holds

him against the wall. Billy pushes French's hands away]
Billy Costigan: Get your fuckin' hands off me!
Mr. French: [calmly] Hey, hey, hey... do you know me?
Billy Costigan: No, no.
Mr. French: Well, I'm the guy that tells you there are guys you can hit and there's guys you can't. Now, that's not quite a

guy you can't hit, but it's almost a guy you can't hit. So I'm gonna make a fuckin' ruling on this right now. You don't fuckin' hit him. You understand?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, excellent. Fine, fine, fine.
Mr. French: I fucking know you. I know your family. You make one more drug deal with that idiot fucking cop-magnet of a cousin of yours and I'll

forget your grandmother was so nice to me. I'll cut your fucking nuts off. You understand that?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, yeah, I do.
Mr. French: What are you drinkin'?
Billy Costigan: [embarrassed] A cranberry juice.
Mr. French: What is it, your period?
[to the bartender]
Mr.

French: Get him a... cranberry juice.
Mr. French: [to the man] Hey, fuckhead, that's Jackie's nephew.
Man Glassed in Bar: Oh.
Mr. French: What? "Oh" fuckin' what?
[punches the man four times in the face]
Mr. French: Get the fuck outta here.

Madolyn: [during his counseling session] What do you expect coming in here?
Billy Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Billy Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Madolyn: You know if you lied, you would have

an easier time getting what you wanted.
Billy Costigan: What does that say about what you do for a living?
Madolyn: I just think we should have a few more meetings before we even talk about prescriptions.
Billy Costigan: Look... look, I'm having panic attacks, alright? The other night I thought I was having a fucking heart

attack. I puked in a trash barrel on the way over here. I haven't slept for fucking weeks.
Madolyn: Is that true?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, that's true. Alright? I said it was fucking true. I want some fucking pills and you're gonna what? You're gonna close my file? Is that what you're going to do?
Madolyn: No, I didn't close your

file. I...
Billy Costigan: [angry] I thought I was supposed to tell the truth here, if only fucking here!
Madolyn: You are! You are!
Billy Costigan: Christ. I mean, a guy comes in here against every, every instinct of privacy and self-reliance he has and what do you do? What do you do, huh? You send him off on the street to

score smack, is that what you do? You're fucking ridiculous!
[Madolyn hands Costigan some Valium]
Billy Costigan: [picking up the pills] Two pills? Great. Why don't you just give me a bottle of scotch and a handgun to blow my fucking head off! Are we done here with this psychiatry bullshit?
Madolyn: You know what? You can leave!

Billy Costigan: What the fuck did I just put myself through? I'm fucking out of here. And what if that was a legitimate threat? Think about it fucking hotshot!

Frank Costello: I got this rat, this gnawing, cheese eating fuckin' rat and it brings up questions... You know, see, Bill, like you're the new guy. Girlfriend... Why don't you stay in the bar that night I got your numbers. Social Security numbers. Everybody's fuckin' numbers.
Billy Costigan: Is there something that you just wanna go ahead and ask me? 'Cause

I'll give you the fuckin' answer, all right? Frank, look at me. Look at me. I'm not the fuckin' rat. Okay? I'm not the fuckin' rat.

[Sullivan tries to enter Queenan's office, but Dignam blocks his way]
Colin Sullivan: Problem?
Dignam: Yeah, I got a problem. I run rat fucks like you, okay? I don't like 'em.
Colin Sullivan: The day you wouldn't take a promotion, let me know. And if you'd taken care of this, I wouldn't even be here.

Dignam: Fuck yourself, you piece of shit.
Colin Sullivan: And I'm gonna need the identity of your undercovers.
Dignam: Blow me, all right? But not literally, though. Unfortunately, there's no promotion involved for you.
[Dignam leaves]
Colin Sullivan: Fucking prick.