Stu: I wanna see breasts. I wanna see Jamie Lee's breasts. When do we see Jamie Lee's breasts?
Randy: Breasts? Not until "Trading Places" in 1983. Jamie Lee was always a virgin in horror movies. She didn't show her tits 'til she went legits.
Cheerleader in Bathroom: She was never attacked. I think she made it all up.
Girl in Bathroom: Why would she lie about it?
Cheerleader in Bathroom: For attention. The girl has some serious issues. What if she did it? What if Sidney killed Casey and Steve?
Girl in Bathroom: Why would she do that?
Cheerleader in Bathroom: Maybe she had the hots for Steve and killed them both in a jealous rage.
Girl in Bathroom: What would Sidney want with Steve? She's got her own bubble-butt boyfriend, Billy.
Cheerleader in Bathroom: Maybe she's a slut, just like her mother.
Girl in Bathroom: Cut some slack. She watched
her mom get butchered.
Cheerleader in Bathroom: And it fucked her up royally. Think about it, her mother's death leaves her disturbed and hostile in a cruel and inhumane world. She's delusional. "Where's God," etc. Completely suicidal. One day she snaps. She wants to kill herself but she realizes out that teen suicide is out this year and homicide is a much healthier,
therapeutic expression.
Girl in Bathroom: Where do you get this shit?
Cheerleader in Bathroom: Ricky Lake.
Girl in Bathroom: You are pathetic.
[They leave the bathroom]
Gale Weather: [as Kenny's dead body lies over the windshield] Oh, God, Kenny. I'm sorry, but get off my fucking windshield!
Principal Himbry: So, two of your fellow students, just savagely murdered, and this is the way that you show your compassion and sensitivity, huh? Let me tell you something...
[pause]
Principal Himbry: You're both expelled. Get out!
Expelled Teen #1: Aw, come on, Mr. Himbry. It was just a joke!
Expelled Teen
#2: That is not fair!
Principal Himbry: You're absolutely right. It is not fair. Fairness would be to rip your insides out and hang you from a tree so we can expose you for the heartless, desensitized little shits that you are!
[last lines]
Gale: Okay I think it's going to go something like this, just stay with me. Hi, this is Gale Weathers with an exclusive eyewitness account of this amazing breaking story. Several more local teens are dead, bringing to an end the harrowing mystery of the masked killings that has terrified this peaceful community like the plot of some scary movie. It all began
with the scream of a 911, and ended in a bloodbath that has rocked the town of Woodsboro. All played out here in this peaceful farmhouse, far from the crimes and the sirens of the larger cities that its residents have fled. Okay, let's take it back to one. Come on, move it! This is my big shot. Let's go.
Randy: There's always some stupid bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend. That's the beauty of it all! Simplicity! Besides, if it gets too complicated, you lose your target audience.
Stu: Because there's no way a girl could have killed them.
Tatum: That is so sexist. The killer could easily be female. Basic Instinct.
Randy: That was an ice pick. Not exactly the same thing.
Stu: Yeah, Casey and Steve were completely hollowed out. Takes a man to do something like that.
Tatum: Or a man's mentality.
Phone Voice: You still haven't told me your name.
Casey: [smiling] Why do you want to know my name?
Phone Voice: Because I want to know who I'm looking at.
Casey: [looks around, frightened] ... What did you say?
Phone Voice: [short pause] I said I want to know who I'm talking to.
Casey: That's not what you said.
Phone Voice: [serious tone] What do you think I said?
Stu: I didn't kill anybody.
Billy: Nobody said you did.
Stu: Thanks, buddy!
Randy: Besides... "Takes a MAN to do something like that!"
Stu: I ought to gut your ass in a second, kid.
Randy: [using Jerry Lewis' voice] Tell me something. Did you really put her liver
in the mailbox? Because I heard they found her liver in the mailbox next to her spleen and her pancreas.