Pinocchio Quotes

Lampwick: Huh! To hear that beetle talk you'd think somethin' was gonna happen to us.
[Donkey ears pop out of Lampwick's head; Pinocchio's eyes widen]
Lampwick: Conscience! Aw, phooey!
[a tail pops out of the seat of Lampwick's pants; Pinocchio puts down the cigar he has been smoking]
Lampwick: Wheres he get that stuff?

"How do you ever expect to be a real boy?" What's he think I look like?
[Now his head is that of a donkey]
Lampwick: A jackass?
Pinocchio: You sure do! Ha-ha, Hee-haw!
Lampwick: [as Pinocchio covers his mouth shocked] Hey, you laugh like a donkey. Ha-ha Hee-haw!
[gasps]
Lampwick: Did that

come outta me?
[Pinocchio nods; Lampwick starts feeling his face and notices the changes]
Lampwick: Oh!
[He raises his arms a little higher and notices his ears]
Lampwick: Huh? What the...
[noticing his tail]
Lampwick: What's going on?
[He looks in the mirror and sees that he is turning into a

donkey]
Lampwick: AAAAHH! I've been double-crossed! Help! Help! Somebody, help! I've been framed! Help!
[Gets down on his knees and begs Pinocchio for help]
Lampwick: Please, you gotta help me. Be a pal! Call that beetle. Call anybody!
[Lampwick's hands turn into hooves]
Lampwick: Mama! Maaaaaaaaaamaaaaaaaaaaa!

Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Hee-haw!

Geppetto: Now close your eyes and go to sleep.
Pinocchio: Why?
Geppetto: Everybody has to sleep. Figaro goes to sleep - and Cleo - and besides, tomorrow, you've got to go to school.
Pinocchio: Why?
Geppetto: Oh, to learn things and get smart.
Pinocchio: Why?

Geppetto: [starts to fall asleep] Because.
Pinocchio: Oh.

Geppetto: Oh, Pinocchio! How did you get down here?
Pinocchio: I fell down.
Geppetto: Oh, you did... Oh! You are talking!
Pinocchio: Uh-huh.
Geppetto: No! No. no, no!
Pinocchio: Yes, and I can move too.
Geppetto: No, no, you can't! I'm

dreaming in my sleep! Oh, wake me up! Wake me up!
[pours a pitcher of water over his head]
Geppetto: Now we see who's dreaming. Go on, say something.
Pinocchio: ...Gee, you're funny. Do it again!
Geppetto: You *do* talk!
Pinocchio: Yes! The Blue Fairy came.
Geppetto: The

Blue Fairy?
Pinocchio: Uh-huh, and I got a conscience.
Geppetto: A conscience?
[Jiminy proudly points to himself]
Pinocchio: And someday, I'm gonna be a real boy!
Geppetto: A real boy! It's my wish! It's come true!

Foulfellow: [after drunkenly singing "Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee"] And the dummy fell for it.
[laughs]
Foulfellow: Hook, line and sinker!
[laughs again]
Gideon: [Dips a smoke-ring in his beer and takes a bite] Hiccup!
Foulfellow: And he still thinks we're his friends. And did Stromboli pay? Plenty!

[places a small bag of coins on the table]
Foulfellow: That shows you how low Honest John will stoop, eh, Giddy?
Gideon: [nodding choking on his beer] Hiccup!

The Coachman: And what might your name be?
Alexander: Alexander.
The Coachman: So you can talk?
Alexander: Yes, sir. I wanna go home to my mama!
The Coachman: Take him back! He can still talk!
Alexander: [pleading with the other rejected donkeys] Please, please,

I don't wanna be a donkey! Let me outta here!
The Coachman: [cracks his whip] Quiet! You boys have had your fun. Now pay for it!

Stromboli: [shuts Pinocchio up in a cage] There! This will be your home - where I can find you always!
Pinocchio: No, no, no!
Stromboli: Yes, yes, yes! To me, you are a belonging. We will tour the world: Paris, London, Monte Carlo, Constantinopolee.
Pinocchio: No, no!
Stromboli: [bangs

his fist on the table] YES! We start TONIGHT!
[stuffs money into a bag]
Stromboli: You will make lots of money...
[stuffs the bag into his cummerbund]
Stromboli: For me!
[picks up a hatchet]
Stromboli: And when you are growing too old, you will make good... FIREWOOD!
[throws the hatchet into a stack

of firewood that also contains a worn-out puppet, laughing]
Pinocchio: Let me out of here! I'm gonna get out! You can't keep me in...!
Stromboli: QUIET! SHUT UP! Before, I knock you silly!
[blows a kiss]
Stromboli: Good night, my little wooden goldmine!
[laughing, leaves and slams the door]

Lampwick: [picks up Jiminy] Hey, who's the beetle?
Jiminy Cricket: Let go! Put me down!
Pinocchio: He's my conscience. He tells me what's right and wrong.
Lampwick: What? You mean to tell me you take orders from a grasshopper?
Jiminy Cricket: Grasshopper? Look here, you - you impudent

young pup! It wouldn't hurt you to take orders from your grasshop - er, your conscience, if you have one!

Geppetto: [Inside Monstro the whale] Get out? Oh, no, no, son. I have tried every way. Why, I even built a raft.
Pinocchio: [noticing it] A raft? That's it! We'll take the raft. And when the whale opens his mouth...
Geppetto: No, no, no, no. Now listen, son. He only opens his mouth when he's eating. Then everything comes in; nothing

goes out.
Pinocchio: Oh.
Geppetto: It's hopeless, Pinocchio. Come, we'll make a nice fire and we cook some of the fish.
Pinocchio: A fire? That's it!
Geppetto: Yes, and then we'll all eat again.
Pinocchio: A great big fire; lots of smoke!
Geppetto: Smoke?

Oh, yes, sure. Smoked fish will taste good.
Pinocchio: Quick, some wood!
[grabs some pieces of wood and a wooden chair and places the wood in Geppetto's arms]
Geppetto: Pinocchio, not the chair!
Pinocchio: Hurry, Father, more wood!
[smashes the chair over a wooden barrel while Geppetto adds the wood pieces]

Geppetto: But what'll we sit on?
Pinocchio: We won't need it. We're getting out!
[Grabs a lit lantern and smashes it over the pile of wood, causing a fire to start. He then adds a blanket to create smoke then promptly starts blowing and fanning on the smoke to force it up. The smoke curls upward toward the top of Monstro]

Geppetto: Getting out? But how?
Pinocchio: We'll make him sneeze!
Geppetto: Make him sneeze? Oh, that will make him mad!