Waiter: Love, it's a motherfucker, huh?
Frank: [Crying] You're my boy, Blue! You're my boy.
Beanie: Don't beat yourself up over this, Mitch. It's not your fault. Dammit, Blue was old. That's what old people do. They die.
Beanie: Because this is a very big idea, my friends. We're talking about a non-exclusive egalitarian brotherhood where community status and, more importantly, age have bearing whatsoever.
Mitch: I wasn't looking for a girl like that.
Beanie: Well, Columbus wasn't looking for America, my man, but that turned out to be pretty okay for everyone.
Woman: [holding a grocery bag] What's going on?
Frank: You tell anyone about this and I'll fucking kill you. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, we'll have him home by tonight. Okay, sweetie.
[reaches into the grocery bag and takes out cheese balls]
Marissa: That's really, loud.
Frank: Yeah, thanks. Took the restrictor plate off to give the Red Dragon a little more juice. But it's not exactly street legal, so keep it on the down low.
[waving to a neighbor]
Frank: Hey Mike!
Frank: That's how you do it. That's how you debate.
Beanie: Don't say sorry to me, Frank. Say it to the baby.
Frank: Sorry, baby.
Beanie: Whose life is ruined?
Mitch: Let's see. Blue's dead. Frank's divorced. I've lost my house. Nicole thinks I'm a total jackass. And we got nine kids who are gonna get expelled from school and you're not even gonna help them out.
Frank: [offering a bread-maker as a gift] What do you think, Max? It's got three speeds.
Nicole: I heard one of your pledges died. Is that true?
Mitch: Well, yes, but Blue was really old. And I feel pretty confident when we get the autopsy back it'll say natural causes.
Marissa: Listen, I'm sorry I didn't call you on your birthday.
Frank: My birthday? What do you mean?
Marissa: Yeah, last Thursday. Oh, you forgot your birthday, didn't you, Frank?
Frank: Damn it. I'm such an idiot.
Frank: I'll be in the neighborhood later on, and I was wondering if maybe you wanted to get some frozen yogurt, or perhaps a whole meal of food, if that would be agreeable. Damnit.
[calls back]
Frank: This is Frank Ricard...
Frank: You know I was thinking we could go back home... have some dinner and pop in the Sisqo CD... no? Weren't thinking that? Ok.
Mitch Martin: At this point, you may be asking yourself, why am I holding this 30 pound cinderblock in my hands? You might also ask yourself, why does this cinderblock have a long piece of string tied to it? And finally, why is the other end of this string tied securely to your penis?
Beanie: And the answer, ladies... is trust.
Beanie: You think I like avoiding my wife and kids to hangout with nineteen-year-old girls everyday?
