I don't believe in God anymore.
I don't like to say I'm not a believer because I still feel like a believer in a lot of things, primarily hope and grace and the power of human connection.
In my home, life was framed as an epic spiritual battle between good and evil.
As a member of Westboro Baptist Church, I became a fixture on picket lines across the country.
My church's antics were such that we were constantly at odds with the world. That reinforced our 'otherness' on a daily basis.
In 2014, as a Christmas gift, I wrote an essay for my husband, about our story. Writing that showed me there was value in interrogating my experiences while they were fresh - especially because I was terrified of forgetting.
Since leaving the church, I've been working with law enforcement involved in counterterrorism and deradicalization. I hoped that illuminating Westboro's ideology - and especially the unraveling of that ideology - would be useful to the people doing that work.
Take heart, and be patient; change takes time but it is possible, and it's way more likely if we can reach out and disagree without demonizing.
When we lose hope that there is a possibility of reaching the other side - I don't even like to say the 'other side' because there are so many sides, and breaking it down into us/them is oversimplifying - it allows us to treat people in a way that's incredibly destructive.
We were raised to believe that our way of seeing the world was the only way.
I try to focus on using my energy to change things, but there are times when I feel so bad.
I believe in so much - I believe in people. I believe in hope.
It really bugs me that Twitter gets such a bad rep.
I don't think that, if you do everything else in your life right and you happen to be gay, you're automatically going to hell.
I don't believe any more that WBC has a monopoly on truth.
I don't believe any more that God hates almost all of mankind.
There's a learned helplessness for a lot of people who are leaving Westboro because you're not allowed to have any kind of independence when you are there so a lot of people don't have practical life skills.
My life was forever changed by people who took the time and had the patience to learn my story and to share theirs with me. They forsook judgment and came to me with kindness and empathy and the impact of that decision was huge.
I feel like I was transformed by the kindness of people who had every reason to show me cruelty and the transformative power of their decision to treat me like a human being, that was so huge, that anytime somebody wants me to talk about that I feel like I absolutely want to do that.
