Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Pam Focker: [about The Early Human School] It's actually considered the Harvard of kindergartens.
Greg Focker: [Perusing a school brochure] Mmm. Well, I think Harvard's cheaper.

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Roz Focker: As an early Hanukkah present, I'm going to send you and Pam a box of these musical condoms.
Greg Focker: Don't do that.

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Andi Garcia: If you're going to sell a drug like Sustengo, you need to make it personal. Do you know any sexually frustrated old dudes with a heart condition?

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Henry Focker: Can a girl poop from her vagina?

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Jack Byrnes: We've had this date since the beginning, Greg.

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Pam Focker: Could you and Dad keep it down, please?

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Bernie Focker: Will you get out of here so I can schtup my wife?

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Jack Byrnes: Sam might be three-quarters Byrnes, whereas Henry could very well have a double dose of Focker in him.

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Jack Byrnes: Sir, Where Is Andi?
Butler: I Cannot Believe Is In The Bathroom, Take It Down From This Message
Jack Byrnes: That's Good Though
Butler: Right!
Jack Byrnes: Fine!

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Jack Byrnes: I know you were telling the truth about Andi, Greg.
Greg Focker: Really?
Jack Byrnes: Yeah. The pulse on your carotid artery remained steady as you pleaded your innocence.

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

Cafe Waitress: Can I Help You?
Greg Focker: I Would Like Some 4 Oranges
Andi Garcia: And a Bottle Of Milk Please
Cafe Waitress: Sure, I Could Take You From This Order
Greg Focker: You Got it
Cafe Waitress: Right, I'll Be Right Back!

Little Fockers
Little Fockers

[Jack has a boner]
Greg Focker: Jack, is everything Ok down there?
Jack Byrnes: Everything's fine.
Greg Focker: Ok. All right. 'Cause you seem to have a little, I mean...
Jack Byrnes: I-I know what I have, Greg, and I'm not concerned about that right now. Right now, what I want from you is the truth.


Greg Focker: Jack... did you take one of those pills?
Jack Byrnes: Well, I was highly preoccupied and Dina wanted to make love, and the label clearly states that it's safe for heart patients.
Greg Focker: Yes, but you need a prescription after you've had a thorough examination.
[turns on a lamp]
Greg

Focker: How long have you had that... situation for?
Jack Byrnes: Stop avoiding the question.
Greg Focker: I'm not avoiding the question. If you've had that for more than four hours, you could bust a capillary and have serious permanent damage. How long have you had it?
Jack Byrnes: Uh, been a little longer than four

hours.
Greg Focker: How long?
Jack Byrnes: Um, maybe about five and a half.
Greg Focker: Jack, you gotta get to an ER right now and get a shot of adreneline to counteract that drug.
Jack Byrnes: Well, you're a nurse. Don't you have that kind of stuff in the house?
Greg Focker:

Yeah, I have an epi-kit, but I'm not gonna give you a shot there, OK?
Jack Byrnes: Focker, there's no way I'm going to an ER room with this thing. Now, you need to stick me, and you need to stick me now! I'm having a dick attack! Stick me!
Greg Focker: Shh! Just... relax, Ok? I'll get the needle.