Rob: Marvin Gaye.
Laura: I know.
Rob: Let's get it on. That's our song. Marvin Gaye is responsible for our entire relationship.
Laura: Oh, is that so? I'd like a word with him then.
Rob: I wasn't interested in Penny's nice qualities, just her breasts. And, therefore, she was no good for me.
Rob: Songs at my funeral: "Many Rivers to Cross" by Jimmy Cliff, "Angel" by Aretha Franklin, and I've always had this fantasy that some beautiful, tearful woman would insist on "You're the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me" by Gladys Knight. But who would that woman be?
Rob Gordon: All three of us writers, we all experience music autobiographically.
Rob Gordon: I think a lot of people do.
Rob Gordon: So I'll have certain songs that mark certain times in our life and I think we're not rare that way.
Rob Gordon: Like I'll use music as fuel, you know?
Rob
Gordon: Not like as inspiration but as fuel like if I need to get into a certain mindset I know there's certain songs that I can turn on that'll just... that's the gas and that'll get me right where I need to go.
Rob Gordon: Or if I need to get out of a certain state put on this song or that song and it just propels you.
Rob Gordon: [Rob's mother starts to cry after Rob tells her over the phone that he and Laura have broken up] I'm okay if that's what's upsetting you...
Rob's Mom: That is NOT what's upsetting me!
Rob Gordon: [Sharply] Well it fuckin' should be, shouldn't it?
Rob: [From a deleted scene] Barry, you're over 30 years old. You owe it to yourself, to your friends, to your parents, NOT to play in a band called Sonic Death Monkey!
Barry: I owe it to myself to go RIGHT to the edge, Rob! And this band does exactly that. Over the edge, in fact!
Rob: Well, you'll be going right over the fucking edge
if you come anywhere near me on Friday night!
Barry: That's what we want: reaction! Hey, this was Laura's idea, not mine, buddy. And if Laura's bourgeois lawyer friends can't take it, FUCK them. Let 'em riot, we can take it! We're fuckin' Sonic Death Monkey.
Rob: Do you want to get married - to me?
[Laura burst out laughing]
Rob: I'm serious.
Laura: Yes, I know.
Rob: Well, thanks a frickin' bunch!
Laura: I'm sorry, it's just two days ago you were making tapes for that girl from the Reader. Well, forgive me if I don't think of you as
the world's safest bet.
Rob: Would you marry me if I was?
Laura: What brought all this on?
Rob: I don't know. I'm just sick of thinking about it all the time.
Laura: About what?
Rob: This stuff. Love and settling down and marriage, you know. I want to think about something else.
Laura: [sarcastically] I change my mind. That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard. I do. I will.
Rob: Alison married Kevin! I am fine now! Married her junior high school sweetheart: kissed me on the bench, kissed Kevin on the bench - MARRIED Kevin. This is great! This has got nothing to do with me! This is fate, this is destiny; it is beyond my control, beyond my fault. I love this!