500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Author's Note: The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Especially you Jenny Beckman. Bitch.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Narrator: If Tom had learned anything... it was that you can't ascribe great cosmic significance to a simple earthly event. Coincidence, that's all anything ever is, nothing more than coincidence... Tom had finally learned, there are no miracles. There's no such thing as fate, nothing is meant to be. He knew, he was sure of it now.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Summer: I just... I just woke up one day and I knew.
Tom: Knew what?
Summer: What I was never sure of with you.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: People don't realize this, but loneliness is underrated.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Rachel Hansen: Just because she likes the same bizzaro crap you do doesn't mean she's your soul mate.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: I love how she makes me feel, like anything's possible, or like life is worth it.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Vance: [reading a card that Tom has written] Roses are red, violets are blue... Fuck you, whore!

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: Do you ever do this, you think back on all the times you've had with someone and you just replay it in your head over and over again and you look for those first signs of trouble?

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Narrator: This is a story of boy meets girl. The boy, Tom Hansen of Margate, New Jersey, grew up believing that he'd never truly be happy until the day he met "the one." This belief stemmed from early exposure to sad British pop music and a total misreading of the movie 'The Graduate.' The girl, Summer Finn of Shinnecock, Michigan, did not share this belief. Since the

disintegration of her parent's marriage she'd only loved two things. The first was her long dark hair. The second was how easily she could cut it off and not feel a thing. Tom meets Summer on January 8th. He knows almost immediately she is who he has been searching for. This is a story of boy meets girl, but you should know upfront, this is not a love story.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Rachel Hansen: Look, I know you think she was the one, but I don't. Now, I think you're just remembering the good stuff. Next time you look back, I, uh, I really think you should look again.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: She took a giant shit on my face. Literally.
Alison: Literally?
Tom: Not literally. That's disgusting. Jesus. What's the matter with you?

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: Yeah, uh, this is... And Rhoda, no disrespect, but um, this is total shit.
McKenzie: Tom!
Tom: "Go for it" "You can do it"? That's not inspirational, that's suicidal. If pickles goes for it right there, that's a dead cat. These are lies. We're liars. Think about it. Why do people buy these things? It's not 'cause they wanna say

how they feel. People buy cards 'cause they can't say how they feel or they're afraid too. We provide the service that lets them off the hook. You know what? I say to hell with it. Let's level with America. At least let them speak for themselves! Right? I mean, look! What-What is this? What does it say? "Congratulations on your new baby." Right? How 'bout, "Congratulations on your new baby. Guess

that's it for hanging out. Nice knowing you."
Vance: Sit down, Hansen.
Tom: How bout this one, with all the pretty hearts on the front? I think I know where this ones going. Yep! "Happy Valentines Day, sweetheart. I love you." That sweet? Ain't love grand? This is exactly what I'm talking about. What does that even mean, "love"? Do you know? Do you?

Anybody?
McKenzie: Tom...
Tom: If somebody gave me this card, Mr. Vance, I would eat it. It's these cards, and the movies and the pop songs, they're to blame for all the lies and the heartache, everything. We're responsible. *I'm responsible.* I think we do a bad thing here. People should be able to say how they feel, how they really feel, not you

know, some words that some stranger put in their mouths. Words like "love"... that don't mean anything. Sorry, I'm sorry. I, uh... I quit. I'm... There's enough bullshit in the world without my help.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Paul: Robyn is better than the girl of my dreams. She's real.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Narrator: Most days of the year are unremarkable. They begin and they end with no lasting memory made in between. Most days have no impact on the course of a life.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: It's these cards and the movies and the pop songs, they're to blame for all lies and the heartache, everything.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Summer: Well, you know, I guess it's 'cause I was sitting in a deli and reading Dorian Gray and a guy comes up to me and asks me about it and... now he's my husband.
Tom: Yeah. And... So?
Summer: So, what if I'd gone to the movies? What if I had gone somewhere else for lunch? What if I'd gotten there 10 minutes later? It was, it was

meant to be. And... I just kept thinking... Tom was right.
Tom: No.
Summer: Yeah, I did.
[laughs]
Summer: I did. It just wasn't me that you were right about.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: You don't want to be named as anybody's girlfriend, and now you're someone's wife?

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: Look, we don't have to put a label on it. That's fine. I get it. But, you know, I just... I need some consistency.
Summer: I know.
Tom: I need to know that you're not gonna wake up in the morning and feel differently.
Summer: And I can't give you that. Nobody can.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Summer: [Tom is listening to headphones in an elevator with Summer. She notices the music] I love the Smiths.
Tom: Sorry?
Summer: I said I love the Smiths.
Summer: [they stare at each other for a moment] You... You have good taste in music.
Tom: [repeating after her] You... like the

Smiths?
Summer: [singing] To die by your side, such a heavenly way to die.
[speaking]
Summer: I love em.
Tom: [elevator stops, Summer leaves while Tom remains dumbfounded] Holy shit.

500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

Tom: What happened? Why? Why didn't they work out?
Summer: What always happens. Life.