Stewardess Quotes

Will: [during a therapy session] You know, I was on this plane once. And I'm sittin' there and the captain comes on and he does his whole, "We'll be cruising at 35,000 feet," then he puts the mike down but he forgets to turn it off. Then he turns to the copilot and goes, "You know, all I could go for right now is a fuckin' blow job and a cup of coffee." So the stewardess fuckin'

goes bombin' up from the back of the plane to tell him the mic's still on, and this guy behind me goes, "Hey, hon, don't forget the coffee!"

[One of the flight attendants reaches Holly's row]
Connie, Stewardess #1: Can I get you another?
Holly McClane: [looks at Thornburg across the aisle] No thank you. I only have to look at his face for another fifteen to twenty minutes.
[the intercom comes on]
Pilot (Northeast Airlines plane): Ladies and gentlemen, this

is the captain speaking. I've just been informed by Dulles Traffic Control that there's a weather front moving in ahead of us.
[flips a switch]
Pilot (Northeast Airlines plane): We may be up here a little while longer.
Holly McClane: On second thought.
[Holly holds out her glass]

Ordell Robbie: This you and me talking, is this like a lawyer-client thing, and you can't repeat nothing I tell you?
Max Cherry: You're not my client until you get busted and I bond you out.
Ordell Robbie: Well, if we ain't got no - what's that shit called? - confidentiality, why should I tell you a thing?
Max

Cherry: Because you want me to know what a slick guy you are. You got stewardesses bringing you fifty grand.
Ordell Robbie: Now why would a stewardess be bringing me fifty grand?
Max Cherry: Now you want me to speculate on what you do. My guess is you're in the drug business, except the money's moving the wrong way. Whatever you're into, you

seem to be getting away with it, so more power to you.

Elaine Dickinson: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your stewardess speaking... We regret any inconvenience the sudden cabin movement might have caused, this is due to periodic air pockets we encountered, there's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight... By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
[all hell breaks loose

in the cabin]

James Bond: Special plane, lunch at the White House... how come?
Felix Leiter: The President wants to thank you personally.
James Bond: Oh, it was nothing, really.
Felix Leiter: I know that, but he doesn't.
James Bond: I suppose I'll be able to get a drink there.
Felix

Leiter: I told the stewardess liquor for three.
James Bond: Who are the other two?
Felix Leiter: Oh, there are no other two.

Jessica: I am telling them you're twelve so you can fly unaccompanied and the stewardess won't carry you around and stuff like that.
Jonah Baldwin: Are you crazy! Who'd believe I'm twelve?
Jessica: If it's in the computer, they believe anything.
Jonah Baldwin: Are you sure?
Jessica: Do

you want me to say that you are really really short for your age and they shouldn't say anything because it would hurt your feelings.
Jonah Baldwin: Yeah, that's a great idea!

[opening lines]
Gordon: Girls, your mother and I are getting divorced. Don't cry. I know you're upset, I know you're confused. I don't know what your mother told you, but let me explain it from my side in terms you can understand... You got your doll, right? You got your doll there.
Five Year Old Kim: Yeah.
Gordon: You got

your doll and you like your doll, right? You love your doll.
Five Year Old Kim: Yes.
Gordon: Yes, you love the doll. But what if I told you that was the only doll you're allowed to play with the rest of your life. How would you feel?
Five Year Old Kim: Sad.
Gordon: You'd feel sad, of course, 'cause

there are a lot of other dolls on your shelves. And if you play with the other dolls, you can't have that doll anymore. Even though that doll doesn't want to play with you at this point. You're both living a lie. There's other dolls you like, and they're making new dolls every year. You want a stewardess doll?
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim:

Yeah.
Gordon: How about a slightly overweight cocktail waitress doll?
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim: Yeah.
Gordon: What about a doll who happens to be best friends with your main doll?
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim: Yeah.

Gordon: It could happen, right?
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim: Yeah.
Gordon: What about a doll you only play with one day and never see again?
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim: Yeeeah.
Gordon: What about a doll where your friend's

playing with a doll and he needs you to, you know, kinda man up with the other doll? You don't even wanna play with that doll but you do it cause your friend's playing with that doll and you don't want to sit there and look at the other doll unattended.
Nine Year Old Amy, Five Year Old Kim: ...yeah.
Gordon: So that's why me and

mom are getting divorced.