Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Veronica Corningstone: For the entire Channel 4 news team, I'm Veronica Corningstone.
Ron Burgundy: And I'm Ron Burgundy. Go fuck yourself, San Diego.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast.
Champ Kind: It jumped up a notch.
Ron Burgundy: It did, didn't it?
Brick Tamland: Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart.
Ron Burgundy: I saw that. Brick killed a guy. Did you throw a trident?

Brick Tamland: Yeah, there were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.
Ron Burgundy: Brick, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You should find yourself a safehouse or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brian Fantana: [about Veronica] I'll give this little cookie an hour before we're doing the no-pants dance. Time to musk up.
[opens cologne cabinet]
Ron Burgundy: Wow. Never ceases to amaze me. What cologne you gonna go with? London Gentleman, or wait. No, no, no. Hold on. Blackbeard's Delight.
Brian Fantana: No, she gets a

special cologne... It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.
Ron Burgundy: It's quite pungent.
Brian Fantana: Oh yeah.
Ron Burgundy: It's a formidable scent... It stings the nostrils. In a good way.
Brian Fantana:

Yep.
Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.
[cheesy grin]
Ron Burgundy: That doesn't make sense.
Brian Fantana: Well... Let's go see if we can make this little kitty

purr.
[snarls]

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: I'm in a glass case of emotion.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina.
Veronica Corningstone: No, there's no way that's correct.
Ron Burgundy: I'm sorry, I was trying to impress you. I don't know what it means. I'll be honest, I don't think anyone knows what it means anymore.

Scholars maintain that the translation was lost hundreds of years ago.
Veronica Corningstone: Doesn't it mean Saint Diego?
Ron Burgundy: No. No.
Veronica Corningstone: No, that's - that's what it means. Really.
Ron Burgundy: Agree to disagree.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brick Tamland: I love... carpet.
[pause]
Brick Tamland: I love... desk.
Ron Burgundy: Brick, are you just looking at things in the office and saying that you love them?
Brick Tamland: I love lamp.
Ron Burgundy: Do you really love the lamp, or are you just saying it because you

saw it?
Brick Tamland: [Tries to sound convincing] I love lamp! I love lamp.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brick Tamland: I'm Brick Tamland. People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I like to eat ice cream and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an I.Q. of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: You stay classy, San Diego. I'm Ron Burgundy?
Ed Harken: Dammit. Who typed a question mark on the Teleprompter?

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

[Ron bribes the announcer]
Announcer: You're watching Channel 4 News with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor Ron Burgundy and Tits McGee.
Veronica Corningstone: Good evening, San Diego. I'm Veronica Corningstone. Tits McGee is on vacation.
Ron Burgundy: And I'm Tits... I'm Ron Burgundy.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: Last time I looked in the dictionary, my name's Ron Burgundy. What's your name?
Brian Fantana: Brian Fantana.
Champ Kind: Champ Kind.
Brick Tamland: Brian Fantana.
Brian Fantana: No, you're Brick.
Brick Tamland: Brian.
Brian

Fantana: I'm Brian.
Brick Tamland: Veronica.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brick Tamland: Where'd you get your clothes... from the... toilet store?

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ed Harken: A lot of you have been hearing the affiliates complaining about a lack of diversity on the news team.
Champ Kind: What in the hell's diversity?
Ron Burgundy: Well, I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.
Ed Harken: Ron, I would be

surprised if the affiliates were concerned about the lack of an old, old wooden ship, but nice try.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brian Fantana: I think I was in love once.
Ron Burgundy: Really? What was her name?
Brian Fantana: I don't remember.
Ron Burgundy: That's not a good start, but keep going...
Brian Fantana: She was Brazilian, or Chinese, or something weird. I met her in the bathroom of a K-Mart and we

made out for hours. Then we parted ways, never to see each other again.
Ron Burgundy: I'm pretty sure that's not love.
Brian Fantana: Damn it.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal.
Veronica Corningstone: Really.
Ron Burgundy: People know me.
Veronica Corningstone: Well, I'm very happy for you.
Ron Burgundy: I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich

mahogany.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

[subtitled conversation between Ron's dog Baxter and an attacking bear]
Baxter: Leave these people alone. They mean you no harm.
Bear: We Bears are a proud race. They must pay for their intrusion.
Baxter: On my journey I met one of your kind. His name was Katow-jo. We became friends.
Bear: Katow-jo is my cousin. Go in peace.
Baxter: I will tell tales of your

compassion.
Bear: Fare thee well, Baxter. You shall always be friend of the bears.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: [to dog] You're so wise. You're like a miniature Buddha, covered in hair.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brian Fantana: Don't get me wrong, I *love* the ladies. I mean they rev my engine, but they do NOT belong in the newsroom!
Champ Kind: It is anchor *man*, not anchor *lady*. And that is a scientific fact.
Brick Tamland: [Absolutely furious] I don't know what we're yelling about!
Brian Fantana: You're with us,

Ron, what do you think?
Ron Burgundy: [shouting] She... Sh... It's terrible! She has beautiful eyes! And her hair smells like cinnamon!
Brick Tamland: [shouts] *LOUD* *NOISES*!

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Brick Tamland: [riding a bear] Hey, Ron. I'm riding a furry tractor.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Ron Burgundy: [Ron's dog barks at him] You know I don't speak Spanish.