I always wanted to be a comedic actor - that's what I wanted from the job - to do comedy and to create my own comedy. But I still love doing stand-up and will probably be doing it forever. I'd love to be an old guy who can't really walk, can't really stand-up, and I have to sit on the stool and tell jokes.
I know every fight could be my last fight, and if that happens, that's not just a health issue, but I'll be knocked off that king's stool.
It's a prizefight. Get off the stool, take your beating, go back to your corner, rest, and take a beating again. Believe in your own talent. Marry well.
There are three legs of the stool; spending, entitlements and making the tax code fair and equitable. That's the three legs of the stool. If we do all of those in a responsible, bipartisan way, I think the American people would all be very, very happy.
There was a stool there, and some fella kept asking me if I wanted to sit down. When I saw the stool sitting there, it gave me the idea. I'll just put the stool out there and I'll talk to Mr. Obama and ask him why he didn't keep all of the promises he made to everybody.
The next generation is going to have to understand that Social Security is just one leg of a stool. We need to actually bring back that savings incentive, and the only way you're going to be able to do that is if you have a job.
The first time I used 'Viva La Stool,' I was just bragging about something. People grabbed it, and it went viral organically.
We really want Barstool Sports to be a brand that means something. It doesn't just have to be myself... you see the logo, that bar stool and the stars around it, and you know you're getting a certain type of vibe, a certain type of brand.
I try to teach my son about sanitation, especially when handling foods like chicken that could be dangerous. I remind him to wash his hands all the time. When my son cooks with me, he stands on a step stool so he can reach the stove. I teach him about safety and fire.
I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under any of them.
