Of course I would like to return to Spanish football, but I promised myself I would be a success in England.
I'm going to say it out loud: I'm available for England selection if they serve chicken for pre-match.
Americans are always mortified when I tell them this, but in England, it's a tradition to put your plaques and photographs and awards and gold records and stuff in your bathroom. I don't know why.
More and more do I see that only a successful revolution in India can break England's back forever and free Europe itself. It is not a national question concerning India any longer; it is purely international.
Some people admire the aspirational rock star figures whose biopics make it to TV, the people they watched as kids and made them want to play football for England. For some comics, it is often the Doug Stanhopes and the Joan Rivers.
I had a bad break up at university - you know, when your heart breaks for the very first time, and you think, 'I must leave this island,' as if it had never happened to anyone before. I said 'OK, I'll go to England,' and it was the best decision I ever made.