Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Igor: Dr. Frankenstein...
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: "Fronkensteen."
Igor: You're putting me on.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, it's pronounced "Fronkensteen."
Igor: Do you also say "Froaderick"?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No... "Frederick."

Igor: Well, why isn't it "Froaderick Fronkensteen"?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: It isn't; it's "Frederick Fronkensteen."
Igor: I see.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You must be Igor.
[He pronounces it ee-gor]
Igor: No, it's pronounced "eye-gor."
Dr. Frederick

Frankenstein: But they told me it was "ee-gor."
Igor: Well, they were wrong then, weren't they?

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Igor: You know, I'll never forget my old dad. When these things would happen to him... the things he'd say to me.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What did he say?
Igor: "What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night? Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?"

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [to Igor] Now that brain that you gave me. Was it Hans Delbruck's?
Igor: [pause, then] No.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Ah! Very good. Would you mind telling me whose brain I DID put in?
Igor: Then you won't be angry?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I will NOT be

angry.
Igor: Abby someone.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [pause, then] Abby someone. Abby who?
Igor: Abby... Normal.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [pause, then] Abby Normal?
Igor: I'm almost sure that was the name.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [chuckles, then]

Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into a seven and a half foot long, fifty-four inch wide GORILLA?
[grabs Igor and starts throttling him]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Is that what you're telling me?

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Inga: Werewolf!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Werewolf?
Igor: There.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What?
Igor: There, wolf. There, castle.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Why are you talking that way?
Igor: I thought you wanted to.

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, I don't want to.
Igor: [shrugs] Suit yourself. I'm easy.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[Froederick and Igor are exhuming a dead criminal]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What a filthy job.
Igor: Could be worse.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: How?
Igor: Could be raining.
[it starts to pour]

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [Reading from his grandfathers' notebook] "As the minuteness of the parts formed a great hinderance to my speed, I resolved therefore to make a being of a gigantic stature."
[pause]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Of course. That would simplify everything.
Inga: In other vords: his veins, his feet, his

hands, his organs vould all have to be increased in size.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Exactly.
Inga: He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That goes without saying.
Inga: Voof.
Igor: He's going to be very popular.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Love is the only thing that can save this poor creature, and I am going to convince him that he is loved even at the cost of my own life. No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for. Do you understand? Do not open this door.


Inga: Yes, Doctor.
Igor: Nice working with ya.
[Dr. Frederick Frankenstein goes into the room with The Monster. The Monster wakes up]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. What's the matter with you people? I was joking! Don't you know a joke when you hear one?

HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here! Open this goddamn door or I'll kick your rotten heads in! Mommy!

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You know, I'm a rather brilliant surgeon. Perhaps I can help you with that hump.
Igor: What hump?

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [to Inga from behind the bookcase] Put... the candle... back!

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[after sex with The Monster]
Elizabeth: Oh. Where you going?... Oh, you men are all alike. Seven or eight quick ones and then you're out with the boys to boast and brag. YOU BETTER KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. Oh... I think I love him.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Igor, help me with the bags.
Igor: [Imitating Groucho Marx] Soitenly. You take the blonde, I'll take the one in the toiben.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I was talking about the luggage.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Igor: What is this?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Schwartzwalder Kirschtorte.
The Monster: [off-screen] MMMMMMM!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Oh, do you like it? I'm not partial to desserts myself, but this is excellent.
Igor: Who are you talking to?
Dr. Frederick

Frankenstein: To you. You just made a yummy sound, so I thought you liked the dessert.
Igor: I didn't make a yummy sound, I just asked you what it is.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: But you did. I just heard it.
Igor: It wasn't me.
Inga: It wasn't me.
Dr. Frederick

Frankenstein: Well, now look here. If it wasn't you, and it wasn't you...
[he asks himself]
The Monster: [off-camera] Mmmmmm!

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[from inside the haycart]
Inga: Hallo. Vould you like to have a roll in ze hay?
[Dr. Frankenstein stutters]
Inga: It's fun.
[She begins to roll in the hay]
Inga: Roll, roll, roll in ze hay.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[Frederick, Inga and Igor find an abandoned violin]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Well this explains the music.
Igor: It's still warm.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Well, dear, are you ready?
Inga: Yes, Doctor.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Elevate me.
Inga: Now? Right here?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Yes, yes, raise the platform.
Inga: Oh. Ze platform. Oh, zat, yah, yah... yes.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[Frankenstein, Igor and Inga in front of HUGE castle doors]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What knockers.
Inga: Oh, thank you doctor.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That music...
Frau Blücher: Yes. It's in your blood - it's in the blood of ALL Frankensteins. It reaches the soul when words are useless. Your grandfather used to play it to the creature HE vas making.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Then it was you all the time.
Frau Blücher: Yes.


Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You played that music in the middle of the night...
Frau Blücher: Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: ...to get us to the laboratory.
Frau Blücher: Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That was YOUR cigar smoldering in the ashtray.
Frau

Blücher: Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: And it was you... who left my grandfather's book out for me to find.
Frau Blücher: Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: So that I would...
Frau Blücher: Yes.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Then you and Victor were...

Frau Blücher: YES. YES. Say it. He vas my... BOYFRIEND.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Frau Blücher: Good night, Herr Doktor.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Good night, Frau Blücher.
[horses whinny]

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Damn your eyes.
Igor: [to camera] Too late.

Young Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein

[after failing to bring the creature to life]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Nothing.
Inga: Oh, Doctor, I'm sorry.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No. No. Be of good cheer. If science teaches us anything, it teaches us to accept our failures, as well as our successes, with quiet dignity and grace.
[starts beating up the

creature]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Son of a bitch! Bastard! I'll get you for this! What did you do to me? What did you do to me.
Inga: Stop it! Stop that! Stop it! You'll kill him!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I don't want to live. I do not want to live.
Igor: Quiet dignity and grace
[rolls

eyes]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Oh... mama...