Training Day Quotes

Alonzo Harris: [to the residents of The Jungle] Aww, you motherfuckers. Okay. Alright. I'm putting cases on all you bitches. Huh. You think you can do this shit... Jake. You think you can do this to me? You motherfuckers will be playing basketball in Pelican Bay when I get finished with you. SHU program, nigga. 23 hour lockdown. I'm the man up in this piece. You'll never see the

light of... who the fuck do you think you're fucking with? I'm the police, I run shit around here. You just live here. Yeah, that's right, you better walk away. Go on and walk away... 'cause I'm gonna' burn this motherfucker down. King Kong ain't got shit on me. That's right, that's right. Shit, I don't, fuck. I'm winning anyway, I'm winning... I'm winning any motherfucking way. I can't lose.

Yeah, you can shoot me, but you can't kill me.

Alonzo Harris: [in a coffee shop] Get some chow in you before we go to the office, my dollar.
Jake Hoyt: Thank you sir, but I ate...
Alonzo Harris: Fine, don't.
Jake Hoyt: It's nice here.
Alonzo Harris: May I read my paper?
Jake Hoyt: I'm sorry, sir, I...

Alonzo Harris: Thank you.
Jake Hoyt: You know what, I'll get something to eat.
Alonzo Harris: No. Hell no you won't, you fucked that up. I'm trying to read my paper. Please, shut up.
Jake Hoyt: I sure won't mind roasting in a black-and-white all day.
Alonzo Harris: Tell me a story,

Hoyt.
Jake Hoyt: My story?
Alonzo Harris: No, not your story. A story. Because you can't keep your mouth shut long enough for me to read my paper. Tell me a story.
Jake Hoyt: I don't think I know any stories.
Alonzo Harris: You don't know any stories? Okay, I'll tell you a story. This is a newspaper.

It's 90 per cent bullshit, but it's entertaining. That's why I read it, because it entertains me. You won't let me read it, so you entertain me with your bullshit. Tell me a story, right now.

Alonzo Harris: [while driving in his Monte Carlo] You okay, kid? That was a man-sized hit you took, dog. When was the last time you smoked weed?
Jake Hoyt: Last time I smoked weed... 12th grade. We were... we were...
Alonzo Harris: Smoking weed.
Jake Hoyt: Yeah, yeah.
Alonzo Harris:

Left that out your service jacket. Yeah, I know you got secrets. Everybody got secrets. Didn't know you liked to get wet, dog.
Jake Hoyt: What's "wet"?
Alonzo Harris: Butt-naked. Ill. Sherms. Dust. PCP. Primos. P-Dog. That's what you had. That's what you were smoking, you couldn't taste it?
Jake Hoyt: No, I've never done it.

Alonzo Harris: You have now. I haven't, but you have.
Jake Hoyt: Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Man, I'm gonna get piss-tested, and then I'm gonna get fired!
Alonzo Harris: Lieutenant's got our back. We know a week before we piss.
Jake Hoyt: Oh, shit. Shit!
Alonzo Harris: Boom!

Jake Hoyt: Why did you do this to me?
Alonzo Harris: Nobody told you to smoke that thing. You made the decision. Live with your decision. Ain't like I put a gun to your head.

Jake Hoyt: [after repeatedly punching Detective Harris] It's no fun when the rabbit has the gun, is it?
Alonzo Harris: [laughing] My nigga...
[to surrounding crowd]
Alonzo Harris: Hey. First dom who puts one in his head... I'll make you a rich man. C'mon now, who wanna get paid? Who wanna get paid?
Jake

Hoyt: They're not like you. You wanna know what I learned today? I'm not like you.
Alonzo Harris: That's good, Jake. Glad to hear it. Good... so what you gonna do know, you gonna shoot me? You gonna bust yo' cherry killin' a cop?
[pulls out badge]
Alonzo Harris: There it is, Jake, hit me. You ain't never killed anybody before, have

you? It ain't like steppin' on ants, Jake. It takes a man to kill... you man enough to kill, Jake?

Alonzo Harris: [in a coffee shop] But, I don't believe you. You tapped that ass, didn't you. C'mon, tell the truth, you know you tapped that ass. You put her in the backseat, BAM. Code-X.
Jake Hoyt: Look man, I got a wife.
Alonzo Harris: You got a dick. You do have a dick, don't you? Okay, the dick lines up straight like that right?

To the right of it and to the left of it are pockets, right? In those pockets are money. Look in either one of 'em, pay the bill.

Jake: [after meeting with the Three Wise Men] How much money was in that bag?
Alonzo: 40 G's.
Jake: What was that for?
Alonzo: You really wanna know?
Jake: Yeah. I asked, didn't I?
Alonzo: Nothing's free in this world, Jake. Not even arrest warrants.

Jake: Shit, I didn't wanna know.

Alonzo Harris: [after killing Roger] Use your ears and hear me, Jake. Sometimes we gotta take this shit all the way. Now, nobody will ever ask you to pull the trigger if you don't want to.
Alonzo Harris: [to Mark] Mark, where are you transferring to?
Mark: S.I.S.
Alonzo Harris: S.I.S. Detective. Give me 18

months, I'll give you a career. We're an elite unit. We make the big seizures. We make the big arrests. But if you're in my unit, you gotta be in it all the way or not at all. I thought that you was man enough to face that. I guess I was wrong. Five proven, decorated officers say that you're the shooter. The investigators are gonna want to pull a tube of your blood to check for intoxicants, and

what are they gonna find, Jake? Do the math. You've been smoking PCP all day, haven't you?
Jake: You've been planning this all day?
Alonzo Harris: I've been planning this all week, son. You talk that crazy shit, I'll make sure that blood gets to the lab. You wanna walk your baby nuts around the block, you won't make it to the corner, but if you're

cool, if you're cool... then you're a hero. You're a virgin shooter above suspicion.

Alonzo Harris: [after killing Roger and framing Jake] Congratulations, son. You're gonna get a Medal of Valor for this.
Jake Hoyt: But I didn't shoot him.
Alonzo Harris: A roomful of cops said you did.
Jake Hoyt: But I didn't. You did.
Alonzo Harris: A Los Angeles Police Department

Narcotics officer was killed today serving a high-risk warrant in Echo Park. Gimme the bitch. LAPD spokesperson says the officer is survived... by his wife and infant child. Shit gets deeper. You get the picture?
Jake Hoyt: Yeah, I get it.
[Jake grabs gun from Alonzo, the crew points guns at Jake]
Jake Hoyt: That's the second time you pointed

a gun at me. There will not be a third!
Alonzo Harris: Goddamn, boy! My nigga, are y'all watching this? That's it!
Paul: It'd be my pleasure to put a hydrashock in that melon...
Alonzo Harris: Wait, wait.
Paul: But naw, I'ma be cool. Now drop the fucking gun now!
Jake Hoyt: You

wanna shoot me, Paul, go ahead. But I'm taking him with me.
Mark: I'm going, Alonzo.
Paul: This motherfucker's a fed.
Alonzo Harris: Naw, he ain't no fed. He's just a choirboy that got the drop on all you fools.
Jake Hoyt: You can't put this shit on me. I did not sign up for this!
Alonzo

Harris: I understand your anger. Everybody, put your guns down.
Tim: [shouts] Hell, naw!
Paul: Choirboy first.
Alonzo Harris: [shouts] Everybody, put your guns down! That's an order.
[shouts]
Alonzo Harris: Put 'em down!

Stan Gursky: [in a steakhouse restaurant] Alonzo, heard you had an expensive weekend in Vegas. How did you ever screw up so bad?
Alonzo: Hey, I didn't know. It's not my town. I'm not omniscient.
Lou Jacobs: The Russians don't care if you have a badge. They'll whack you. You ought to hop a jet out of here.

Alonzo: Why? It's an easy fix. I'll just cash in on an account.
Stan Gursky: Which one?
Alonzo: One of my old ones, my first one. The guy's a high security risk anyway. If I'm not around, who's gonna help keep him off the radar?
Stan Gursky: All right, it's your call. I do not want you to dick this up. I don't

want to see you on the front page like the rest of those assholes.