Sandra: What are your names?
Lee Christmas: [points to himself] Buda...
Lee Christmas: [points to Barney] ... Pest
Sandra: Follow me, please.
[walks away]
Barney Ross: [slowly turns to Lee; deadpan] Buda and Pest? Nice.
Trench: Oh, like I said. I'm busy anyway, so give this job to my friend here. He loves playing in the jungle. Right?
Barney Ross: [sarcastically] Right.
Mr. Church: [Uncertain] That's right.
Trench: [to Barney] Hey, why don't we have dinner?
Barney Ross: Sure. When?
Trench: In a thousand years?
Barney Ross: Too soon.
[Trench walks off]
Mr. Church: [Confused; about Trench] What's his fucking problem?
Barney Ross: He wants to be president.
Tool: [to Ross] You remember that time we was up in Bosnia? We took down them Serb bad boys? All our guys were gettin' chopped up all around us and there was blood everywhere. I never though I was gonna make it out of there and I know you didn't and you didn't either. Kinda feelin' like... dead too, ya know? My heads all very, very black place. Didn't believe in shit. Just goddamn
Dracula black. I remember I got this bottle of this local shit they have over there. That slivovitz... I think that's what it was called. And I ain't feelin' no pain now... and I come up on this, uh... I come up on this overland bridge, and I see this... I see this... I see this woman standing there, ya know? And she's, uh... I stepped out and she saw me, and she's just lookin' right... right in
my eyes. And I was lookin' right in her eyes, and I knew what she was gonna do. She looked at me, and I knew she was gonna jump. You know what I did, man? I just turned around I kept walkin'... until I heard that splash and she was gone. After... after taking all them lives, she was one that I could have saved, but I didn't, and... what I realized later on was if I'd have saved that woman, I might
have saved what was left of my soul, ya know?
[last lines]
Lee Christmas: I'm gonna do you a favor, Tool. "I once knew a man called Tool/To me, was the epitome of cool/He was good with a knife/Bad with a wife/But to think he could beat me/Dreaming he'd defeat me/Cool Tool/You gotta be a fool."
Paine: Who sent you?
Barney Ross: Your hairdresser.
Lee Christmas: [after beating up Lacy's abusive boyfriend and his friends on a basketball court; and after deflating a basketball with a knife on his chest] Next time, I'll deflate all your balls, friend.
Hale Caesar: [after taking out a number of soldiers while his team is behind cover] Remember this shit at Christmas!
Barney Ross: I got a feeling everyone else passed on this job, so our fee is $5 mil.
Mr. Church: $5 mil?
Barney Ross: And I want half upfront, and the other half in an offshore account. You got a problem with that?
Mr. Church: No. What I have a problem with is people who try to fuck me over. So if you take
this money and you don't deliver, or you try to fuck me in some kind of weird cockamamie scheme of yours, me and my people are gonna come get you and your people and chop you up into little fucking dog treats. You got a problem with that?
Barney Ross: Let's talk.
Barney Ross: What the hell's he doing?
Lee Christmas: Hanging a pirate.
Barney Ross: Don't be ridiculous. Gunner! What are you doing?
Gunnar Jensen: Hanging a pirate!
Toll Road: That's seriously demented.
Yin Yang: This is no good.
Hale
Caesar: Not that you'd feel it, but put one in Speed Racer's shoulder.
Barney Ross: Come on. Why don't you man up? Jesus! She wasn't your type.
Lee Christmas: Why don't you keep saying "She wasn't my type?" So I could put a bullet in your bleak brain! Look who I'm taking to. Dracula's life coach. No wonder you're alone.