Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I have my own demons and dark moods. It's weird.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

A man is only as faithful as his options.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I was bused to a school in Gerritsen Beach in Brooklyn in 1972. I was one of the first black kids in the history of the school.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

A sense of humor is great - it goes a long, long way in a marriage.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Dude, I didn't say Jude Law can't act. I didn't say Jude Law was in bad movies. I just said he's in every movie.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I can't cook, but I have a nice book of menus... and I can plate and set the table.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I'm an independent, but I got to admit I lean Democratic.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack. That should be the name of my new DVD: 'Chris Rock: Slightly Above Hack'.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.

Chris Rock
Chris Rock

President of the United States is you know, our boss, so you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen.